Author Topic: default state of mind -- Prey  (Read 85 times)

Offline Seija K.

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default state of mind -- Prey
« on: January 08, 2018, 08:05:31 PM »
  /tw: discussion of death by suffocation, mentions of gore
  /also, negative IC opinions ahead

  The moon's wan light outside was the only reminder she had that she was not in the gods' lair at the moment.

  The cave that they had imprisoned the robot in had appeared cramped even in the daylight, when the sounds of society were audible, giving her some indication that she wasn't about to relive the incident from earlier. Now, in the near-total darkness, the rocks seemed to contract, closing in on her, forcing the oxygen out of what little empty space there was. Every high-pitched creak was an unholy screech, every low thump was a divine footstep behind her, every gust of wind was the feeling of an appendage lunging for her throat.

  Every strike of a fallen pebble against the ground reminded her that the tunnel could cave in at any moment, the stones tumbling down and crushing her, even as she struggled to free herself, even as she tried to cry out for help.

  Getting a few hours of rest the night before, despite the nightmares that wracked her brain, had helped her to stay more alert- she was considering returning to a normal sleep schedule, if only so she could more effectively guard the robot- but there would always be those fears that had been ingrained in her through personal experience.

  ”Are you afraid to lose your worthless life again?” rang a soft, yet mocking voice.

  Seija bit back a growl. Dying hadn’t been the difficult part, even with the pain of slowly suffocating, pieces of shattered bone tearing away at her internal organs. Compared to being torn open and hung on a tree, or decapitated and dismembered, or being dragged directly into hell, her fate had been relatively quick and easy.

  No, the worst part was that it had all been for nothing. One would think that, after dozens of others had died or disappeared because of her negative karma painting a target on their backs, sacrificing her life would finally make things better. James was a capable leader, and between him, Cosmic, Ianthe, Titan, and the new gods, they would have been able to rebuild LithiumClan, she thought.

  And yet it had just made things worse. James had abandoned them all, right as End Game was on the rise. He’d turned out to be just like Michael, and once again, she’d been fooled.

  Who was she kidding, trying to blame James when it was her own fault for trusting him, her own fault for not saving herself, her own fault for not escaping the spirit world earlier?

  With a snarl of frustration, the Utonagan swatted a nearby rock into the wall. What good was that going to do? Absolutely nothing, but she couldn’t take her rage out on the prisoner, not when they were supposed to get more information out of it- and not after it had helped Radiantpaw.

  The memory of seeing the robot helping Rey briefly snapped her out of her agitated haze- not because she found it touching or inspiring, but because it posed a number of questions that she had yet to figure out answers for. The thought of a killer robot showing compassion, perhaps even growing beyond its programming, was frightening, in a way; she already had enough trouble keeping a cool head around it without it adopting unpredictable behavior.

  Yet, at the same time, the contrast was fascinating- and more importantly, it implied that there was more to robots than just their programming. If that were the case, then she needed to correct her mental view of them, lest she come to underestimate them and pay the price for it later.

  Taking a deep breath, the canine took a seat, then glanced blankly at Prey. Gone, for the moment, was the palpable terror and fury from earlier; she had shoved those to the back of her mind, to be faced once her shift ended and she did not have to keep up appearances. ”You assisted Radiantpaw earlier,” she noted after a moment, tilting her head slightly. ”Can I ask why?”

  /ish ending, I typed most of this on mobile
Spoiler: tags (12/26/17) • show

Seija Kijin
  previously went by Phonymillenial (FF!Exiles) and Sunshinevision (FF!Cartel) for the purposes of spying
currently a loner
  former Kaiser of LithiumClan
Xeryus Caliber-Mayella x NPC
twenty-eight months old physically, thirty-one months old mentally, several hundred years old spiritually
Utonagan dog with green eyes- mostly covered in white sheep's wool, has ram's horns on the sides of her head, and has hooves instead of paws
  has second-degree burn scars on her right side (specifically on the facial area, the neck, the shoulder, and the front leg)
  formerly a bicolor domestic feline with green eyes and two small horns
  telepathy (currently unable to use)
  "gravity manipulation" (air manipulation) (also currently unable to use, not purchased yet)
current physical health: 60%
  malnourished, somewhat dehydrated
current mental health: 35%
  dealing with the dissolution of LithiumClan, which she dedicated her life to protecting; feels that she no longer has any purpose outside of passing on the clan's history to someone who will remember it
  is essentially in a trance, focusing solely on one thing at a time and stifling her emotions in order to survive
  suffering from bipolar I disorder, currently in a depressive state
overall physical difficulty: 6/10
overall mental difficulty: 7/10
followed around by an as-yet unnamed pipevine swallowtail butterfly
currently in the possession of three notebooks, written by herself, that detail LithiumClan's history and members
  not looking, has too many bad experiences
migrated from the Feralfront universe
somewhat inspired by (and named after) the stage 5 boss from Touhou 14: Double Dealing Character
@Seija K. to attack/if otherwise needed
  non-offensive actions can be powerplayed (though be warned that she likely will not respond well)
PM this account to plot

everything's just like an illusion
I'll be losing you before long

art in avatar belongs to rabies on Pixiv- used with permission