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Topics - Bryne

Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 12
1
General OOC / what characters do you know me by
« on: June 12, 2019, 08:56:42 PM »
yo I'm curious
what characters of mine are you most familiar with? who was I playing when we met?
this is not an attempt to figure out which of my characters is most famous whatsoever
I'll include a lil list of my most notable characters but I've had several others too
Spoiler: show
Diamond, Phantom/Danny, Selfdestruction/Selena, Grayarea/Grayson, Marine, Catalyst

2
OOC Discussion / gimme those sweet sweet Cat interpretations
« on: May 13, 2019, 01:07:52 PM »
ok so this idea is stolen from Hoot who came up w it w Vix
but basically
gimme at least a paragraph of Cat (~5 sentences)
no writing about the same thing other ppl write about (might be lenient for a ninja or rlly unique drabbles?) and still getting paid. uhh yeah I'm paying 5k per paragraph lads
if you've got any questions about Cat you can dm them to me and I'll answer

3
Announcements / New CA Search
« on: April 30, 2019, 01:11:15 PM »
Hey y'all! It's been a while since we've done a CA search, and we felt it was definitely time to do it again... First one of 2019! So, if you'd like to apply to be staff, just make an application in the staff application board, or bump a pre-existing app! Before you do, however, keep in mind that being staff can be stressful and take up a fair bit of time. Applications will close on May 7th, and after that we'll be announcing the promotions.

4
OOC Discussion / SPRING '19 CHOICE AWARDS
« on: April 14, 2019, 02:10:45 PM »
Yes yes yes at long last we're having a choice awards. Y'all know how these goes, but we've got some rules

1. Only 2 (three if the third is in a -ship category with another person) votes for yourself or your character are allowed (even if you have more than two characters).
2. A 3 vote maximum for any character, let’s spread the love around you guys!
3. Adhere to all the BB rules please and thank you.
4. Have fun you guys!

edit bc I'm stupid and forgot: this will end on May 11

Code: [Select]
[spoiler][b][size=14pt]Favorite...[/size][/b]
[b]Overall:[/b]
[b]Male:[/b]
[b]Female:[/b]
[b]Nonbinary:[/b]
[b]Canon Ship:[/b]
[b]Crack Ship:[/b]
[b]Friendship:[/b]
[b]Rivalry:[/b]

[b][size=14pt]Most Likely To...[/size][/b]
[b]Take over the Badlands:[/b]
[b]Take over accidentally:[/b]
[b]Win the Hunger Games:[/b]
[b]Marry for love:[/b]
[b]Marry for money:[/b]
[b]Become a Starving Artist:[/b]
[b]Drive someone insane:[/b]
[b]Go insane:[/b]
[b]Bitch-slap someone:[/b]
[b]Be bitch-slapped:[/b]
[b]Get slapped by a fish:[/b]
[b]Adopt the entire group:[/b]
[b]Get thrown out by Cat:[/b]

[b][size=14pt]Official...[/size][/b]
[b]Mom:[/b]
[b]Dad:[/b]
[b]Weird cousin:[/b]
[b]Child in need of protecting:[/b]
[b]Rebellious Teen:[/b]
[b]Cinnamonroll:[/b]
[b]Sinnamonroll:[/b]
[b]Sweetheart:[/b]
[b]Asshole:[/b]
[b]Hero:[/b]
[b]Villain:[/b]

[b][size=14pt]OOC...[/size][/b]
[b]Most friendly:[/b]
[b]Most museful:[/b]
[b]Most active:[/b]
[b]Most creative:[/b]
[b]Most likely to make you cry:[/b]
[b]Most likely to need a tissue:[/b]
[b]Most likely to be kind to their character:[/b]
[b]Official evil genius:[/b]
[b]Official weirdest:[/b]
[b]Official funniest:[/b][/spoiler]

5
OOC Discussion / choice awards planning
« on: April 04, 2019, 09:19:32 PM »
so we'll ofc do all your normal categories
but I like having a fuck ton of really random diverse ones
so yeet in your ideas here lads

6
OOC Discussion / survey update + choice award announcement
« on: March 30, 2019, 11:41:32 PM »
ok so I put up a survey a couple days ago asking three (really just two tbh) questions with an optional comment field. I know I didn't leave it up for very long, but I got ten responses really quickly and I haven't gotten any new additions since the wee hours of yesterday, so I figure I'm good to go. I included the screenshot of the charts in the spoiler, but I'll still break it down in text.

Spoiler: show


All ten people are currently in the Badlands.

Five people felt that the cliques improved a little bit, two people thought there was a great deal of improvement, one person thought that it got worse and two people thought it was about the same.
(My takeaway is that for most things are at least better, but there are still people feeling left out which means there's still work to be done)

Five people thought that there was enough improvement for a CA, two people did not and three people thought that there wasn't enough improvement, but would still like to have one.
(My takeaway is... looks like we're having a choice awards, lads)

Not everyone wrote down any extra thoughts, but most that took it did. To boil down and paraphrase:
One person didn't really see cliques, though they did note that some people are just doing their own thing
One person hadn't noticed the issue whatsoever
One person went into detail about how things had improved and that yeah there are friend groups, but no one that engages with us is excluded. They also noted that someone will always be complaining about cliques, but said they didn't see any here
One person feels there's people getting ignored and passive aggression, and that some characters are more popular than others
One person stated that they just don't feel welcome
One person thought that oocly things are better but icly things are still really bad.

Ok so. First of all, I'd like to invite the last three individuals to talk to me directly so we can talk about where the problems are in more detail and work on solutions. If they don't want to do that, that's totally fine, I just wanted to leave that little note here.
Secondly, I'll put it out there again that I really need more people to respond to this thread. I'm struggling, and I really need feedback on this stuff. When I'm half getting told things are good and things are shit, it's hard to know what to do.
Third, I post in literally every thread. Every. Single. Thread. (both in BL and ND) I've got a bunch of private threads, and I do my best to make repeated posts in as many threads as possible, while also keeping up with my characters in FL (with questionable success). I'm doing my absolute best to be inclusive, but if I single-handedly could make everyone feel as if there were no cliques, we wouldn't be having complaints. Again, I'm doing the best I can here, but I can't do this alone. I can't make people post in threads, I can't make anyone do anything. I want to get those incentives going, I'm gonna work on getting an activity contest up and running, but I still have no idea what will work for prizes and incentives. Ik that people are busy and muse can be rough, but the time I have to devote to BL is about to start going down, and I can't be 60% of the activity anymore.
Fourth, I don't know where I'm going with this because I just ran into a stress wall and I'm lowkey panicking but uhhh yes please tell me how to improve we're gonna have a choice awards and an activity contest and hopefully we'll get that incentives thing figured out and !! a buddy system ??

7
TNW Plotting / Prank War Plotting [FL v BL]
« on: March 27, 2019, 07:48:57 PM »
okay so if you haven't been lurking around in the discords (hell even if you have), you may not have heard about the prank war that's going to be happening with FL and BL

it's gonna start by Dallas pranking BL. She always starts prank wars w her family back home, and she won't miss this year even if she can't do it to the same people. She starts with Catalyst, but will prank anyone else in BL that she gets the chance to
and then it's happening

soo yeah. this is a thread to plot out pranks and stuff! Dallas is happy to prank ppl in FL too btw, Cat's really only in it for revenge (after acting like they're above it) and to the best of their ability, Michael and Molly want to stay out of it (but are still open to be pranked)

8
General OOC / isn't it weird
« on: March 21, 2019, 02:17:43 PM »
that even tho we have a specific board for private threads and p much all threads in the main boards will be open
we still tag them as open in the titles
even tho it's a given
but like
it'd be so weird if we stopped doing that too

9
OOC Discussion / Badlands Traditions
« on: February 24, 2019, 08:37:40 PM »
All of the traditions are singing "should I stay or should I go" at us
I need food and sleep

anyway
last survey I did the question badly so? here's a new one? https://goo.gl/forms/sWh4xqfwNzb2ihxu2
if you've got anything you'd like to say about the traditions, feel free to share your thoughts here or the survey
if you've got a suggestion, again, here or the survey would be A+
if not that's cool too
this is rushed
and bad
but I hope you get what I'm throwing down and that what I'm throwing down is more than possible mania

10
OOC Discussion / Survey Results and Discussion Thread
« on: February 24, 2019, 08:35:05 PM »
ok so a while back I did a survey and I got 6 replies. I never fully followed up on it, though I always planned to. There was just a lot I needed to sort through in my head, and truth be told there were aspects of the survey that weren't well thought out. But! I don't want anyone to think I forgot about this or didn't care, so here's the results from the survey!

Spoiler: results • show
Q1. Do you roleplay in the Badlands? And if you're comfortable, how deep is your history, if you have one?
Like I said, six people filled this out. At the time, four had been there for a while and two were recent joiners.

Q2. If you're already in the Badlands, could changes (especially to theme) you dislike potentially make you want to leave, or if you liked them would they make you more excited to roleplay there? If you're not in the Badlands, would changes you dislike keep you away, or could changes you do like draw you in?
This question was kind of a mess but the general response was that making changes would have little effect on people, with some reservations here and there.

Q3. What has been your experience (specifically within the last two months) with the OOC community?
—One person thought the whole group was cliquey.
—Five people thought a few individuals were cliquey.
—One person thought that there were only a few people that weren't cliquey.
—Two people thought it was a welcoming environment.
—One person didn't think it seemed cliquey because of different levels of involvement overall.
To me that highlighted that there's an issue, perhaps not one that's as bad as it could be but nearly everyone has felt like there's some problems. I'll be talking about this more a bit later. (For those confused why the numbers seem a little weird, people were allowed to select multiple things and write in)

Q4. What do you think of the action Bryne has been taking to try and address the cliques?
—Two people said it was too soon to tell.
—One person said I was doing well.
—One person said I would have to do more.
—One person said it was a start.
—The last person abstained.
I know that I've been doing little more than calling things out in meetings, but I do have more things I'll be implementing to try and encourage more plots and engagement, and I'll also be taking suggestions.

Q5. Do you think that the Discord has overall been a positive place and beneficial to the group?
—Five people said yes.
—One person said no.

Q6. Is there anything that you think could improve it, or should it just be closed (even temporarily)?
—One person thought it was a little confusing to have some channels be the same as threads on the site (chatting, etc).
—One person thought that the niche category should be removed, or at least unused channels should be deleted after a period of inactivity.
—One person thought it should be permanently closed.
—One person commented on how hard it can be to keep up at times.
—The other two didn't comment.
Ok for the duplicate threads/channels, those are just the basic things you'll get everywhere, and personally I don't think it makes sense to get rid of them. I don't want to make it harder for people to chat and plot on BB, nor strip anyone without discord of the ability to engage with the community in that way. Still, most of us use the discord and most of the chatting and plotting are done there, so it doesn't make sense to remove those channels either. As far as the niche category goes, I'm not all that opposed to moving the "au stuff" to the secondary category and removing the specific au channels. When it comes to closing down the discord, I? Okay. I'm sad and sorry that it's been a negative place for someone, but I think that the overwhelming consensus would be to keep the discord, as it's been a good place for most. Lastly, that's just the nature of discords and hell, I've even been in chat threads that moved that fast, maybe even faster. That was more of a comment on the nature of it (with a note that they're sure they can ask what they missed, which they absolutely can!), so there's not much else for me to say on that.

Q7. Is there anything else that needs addressing?
—One person said the ic community.
—Three people said not enough replies/replies come too slowly.
—Two people said more external conflict with other groups.
—Three people said more internal conflict within the Badlands.
—One person said HP activity.
—One person said territory.
—One person was worn out on the number of aus at the time.
—One person felt they were too new to have a good sense of what needed addressing.
Okay so! All of these are things that I've been trying to work on (minus territory), you guys can expect to see some more external stuff happening real soon, and some internal stuff as well. Also, we've just lost both of our HPs so that's. A thing ig. Yeah. I'll be addressing all that stuff later in this post or in different places.

Q8. What do you like about the Badlands/feel doesn't need improvement?
—Two people said the ooc community.
—Two people said the ic community.
—Two people said the number of threads.
—Two people said external conflict.
—Three people said internal conflict.
—Three people said HP activity.
—Three people said writing/muse.
—Two people said the territory.
—One person appreciates the surveys and threads meant to address the issues here.
wow I feel like I dropped the ball on that last thing, but hey, glad you guys are enjoying those aspects of BL, still gonna try and make everything as good as it can be!

Q.9 Regarding the old traditions of the Badlands, which would you like to see KEPT and potentially even incorporated more?
—Four people said the services.
—Three people said the initiation.
—Two people said seasonal tournaments.
—Three people said Summer Tide.
—Four people said traditional holidays.
Okay without a counter of "what do you want to see removed" this doesn't really help me that much but hindsight is 20/20, right? So there's gonna be another separate thread discussing what to keep and remove as well as possibly add, as well as a new dedicated survey.


OK SO because there is so much to get through, here are my main talking points for this thread. Answer as many as you can but if you can only comment on some of them, that's totally fine too.

1. Cliques, exclusion and activity
I'm hoping that people have had a better experience with the ooc community, but I fear that's not the case. Threads largely get ignored unless people have plotted together. This is something that's rampant on the board, and happens to me too. Unfortunately, there's little I can do about this as I can't force people to have muse or time to post, nor can I force anyone to devote what free time they have to their characters. All I can do is post in as many threads as I possibly can and try to incentive people to plot and post. Honestly, y'all, I'm taking suggestions on this bc idk how to make people plot and post. I know that the creator of the thread keeping up with it helps keep the thread alive, but sometimes people just bail after one post, if they bother with that much at all.

2. My incentive plans
I'm going to be making a plot buddy thing, I was actually going to do it tonight BUT I wanted the rewards to be part of a larger reward sort of thing? Which I. have a lose jumbling of concepts for but I don't actually know what would be best for incentives. Will you guys write for memes? Bones? items? Ic stuff? Art? oh god I'd fall through on making art so fucking fast it's terrible ooc things about your character? Help me out y'all I wanna do something that'll work

3. Niche Category
I just kind of added it impulsively? and honestly it hardly ever gets used so I wouldn't mind moving the "au stuff" channel to the secondary category and moving the specific aus to the graveyard. tbh I feel like we should either use it more or get rid of it.

4. Conflict
As far as internal conflict goes, I don't want to spoil all of my plots but stuff is coming and I'm totally on board for more stuff happening, so if you've got ideas hmu. Also, for external stuff, there might be something with ND coming up. Keep an eye out for that. (Again, if anyone wants to do some external conflict hmu).

5. HPs and titles
ok y'all here's the deal. I've not really promoted anyone because I've been trying to see who responds to threads a lot, regardless of what the thread's about or who made it, as well as generally consistent and good activity. I want someone who's around, and I haven't seen that too much? But that's what I look for in HPs, I really want to promote some people soon and uhh yes titles. bandannas initiation all that. again, it's stuff that needs to happen ic; it can be plotted out really easily it just needs to happen. That's what the mass training/testing thread is for, Cat hasn't given anyone a red bandanna since they started the tradition with the exception of their mother, and I really want to start giving these out more. Same with titles! Like, Cat just needs to see Mord in action and he'll have the Medic title, but it hasn't really... happened. ig this is more for transparency's sake than anything else idk if there's anything anyone can add but if you've got smth throw it at me.

6. Other?
I'm making a second thread for discussions about traditions which will be up soon (edit: oh wow a link). Uh. I feel like I'm missing smth but as y'all can see I've got a lot I'm trying to get through and I'm a gd mess so. yeah this is why it took so long but anyway. uh. if you've got anything else you'd like to talk about, please feel free to? I feel like I'm missing a lot but ahhh

12
Helping Hub / who gave me the ability to think
« on: February 21, 2019, 03:40:59 PM »
yeet your personal thoughts in here
and yes I also want to know why my brain wonders these things

13
OOC Discussion / valentine's party
« on: February 13, 2019, 03:28:37 PM »
so there's gonna be a main thread at the casino with food and music (does anyone's char play music or have an ipod they can lend to the cause) and dancing
and uhhh we'll prob need someone to yeet their char over to FL w the invite
anything else?

14
Helping Hub / Badlands survey
« on: January 26, 2019, 03:42:42 PM »
Hey guys! I just cooked up a couple of surveys for the Badlands, one concerning the likely rank changes and the other including broader topics. In the long run, the latter will be more important but if you've only got time for a quick survey, I need the former done sooner than the other.
Edit: removed rank survey since it's now closed.
Overall survey: https://goo.gl/forms/xw6a3dU5RJp8s2fy1

15
thanks to Sango and Cygnus for this
special surprise if you click the text, no it is not Rick Astley
real talk tho it's weird seeing him old now it just. shattered the image I had for him from the music video he made in the 80s

OH GOD THE SPOILER DIDN'T WORK WHY DIDN'T IT WORK
Spoiler: show
According to all known laws
of aviation,

 
there is no way a bee
should be able to fly.

 
Its wings are too small to get
its fat little body off the ground.

 
The bee, of course, flies anyway

 
because bees don't care
what humans think is impossible.

 
Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

 
Ooh, black and yellow!
Let's shake it up a little.

 
Barry! Breakfast is ready!

 
Ooming!

 
Hang on a second.

 
Hello?

 
- Barry?
- Adam?

 
- Oan you believe this is happening?
- I can't. I'll pick you up.

 
Looking sharp.

 
Use the stairs. Your father
paid good money for those.

 
Sorry. I'm excited.

 
Here's the graduate.
We're very proud of you, son.

 
A perfect report card, all B's.

 
Very proud.

 
Ma! I got a thing going here.

 
- You got lint on your fuzz.
- Ow! That's me!

 
- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000.
- Bye!

 
Barry, I told you,
stop flying in the house!

 
- Hey, Adam.
- Hey, Barry.

 
- Is that fuzz gel?
- A little. Special day, graduation.

 
Never thought I'd make it.

 
Three days grade school,
three days high school.

 
Those were awkward.

 
Three days college. I'm glad I took
a day and hitchhiked around the hive.

 
You did come back different.

 
- Hi, Barry.
- Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.

 
- Hear about Frankie?
- Yeah.

 
- You going to the funeral?
- No, I'm not going.

 
Everybody knows,
sting someone, you die.

 
Don't waste it on a squirrel.
Such a hothead.

 
I guess he could have
just gotten out of the way.

 
I love this incorporating
an amusement park into our day.

 
That's why we don't need vacations.

 
Boy, quite a bit of pomp...
under the circumstances.

 
- Well, Adam, today we are men.
- We are!

 
- Bee-men.
- Amen!

 
Hallelujah!

 
Students, faculty, distinguished bees,

 
please welcome Dean Buzzwell.

 
Welcome, New Hive Oity
graduating class of...

 
...9:15.

 
That concludes our ceremonies.

 
And begins your career
at Honex Industries!

 
Will we pick ourjob today?

 
I heard it's just orientation.

 
Heads up! Here we go.

 
Keep your hands and antennas
inside the tram at all times.

 
- Wonder what it'll be like?
- A little scary.

 
Welcome to Honex,
a division of Honesco

 
and a part of the Hexagon Group.

 
This is it!

 
Wow.

 
Wow.

 
We know that you, as a bee,
have worked your whole life

 
to get to the point where you
can work for your whole life.

 
Honey begins when our valiant Pollen
Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.

 
Our top-secret formula

 
is automatically color-corrected,
scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured

 
into this soothing sweet syrup

 
with its distinctive
golden glow you know as...

 
Honey!

 
- That girl was hot.
- She's my cousin!

 
- She is?
- Yes, we're all cousins.

 
- Right. You're right.
- At Honex, we constantly strive

 
to improve every aspect
of bee existence.

 
These bees are stress-testing
a new helmet technology.

 
- What do you think he makes?
- Not enough.

 
Here we have our latest advancement,
the Krelman.

 
- What does that do?
- Oatches that little strand of honey

 
that hangs after you pour it.
Saves us millions.

 
Oan anyone work on the Krelman?

 
Of course. Most bee jobs are
small ones. But bees know

 
that every small job,
if it's done well, means a lot.

 
But choose carefully

 
because you'll stay in the job
you pick for the rest of your life.

 
The same job the rest of your life?
I didn't know that.

 
What's the difference?

 
You'll be happy to know that bees,
as a species, haven't had one day off

 
in 27 million years.

 
So you'll just work us to death?

 
We'll sure try.

 
Wow! That blew my mind!

 
"What's the difference?"
How can you say that?

 
One job forever?
That's an insane choice to have to make.

 
I'm relieved. Now we only have
to make one decision in life.

 
But, Adam, how could they
never have told us that?

 
Why would you question anything?
We're bees.

 
We're the most perfectly
functioning society on Earth.

 
You ever think maybe things
work a little too well here?

 
Like what? Give me one example.

 
I don't know. But you know
what I'm talking about.

 
Please clear the gate.
Royal Nectar Force on approach.

 
Wait a second. Oheck it out.

 
- Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!
- Wow.

 
I've never seen them this close.

 
They know what it's like
outside the hive.

 
Yeah, but some don't come back.

 
- Hey, Jocks!
- Hi, Jocks!

 
You guys did great!

 
You're monsters!
You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it!

 
- I wonder where they were.
- I don't know.

 
Their day's not planned.

 
Outside the hive, flying who knows
where, doing who knows what.

 
You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen
Jock. You have to be bred for that.

 
Right.

 
Look. That's more pollen
than you and I will see in a lifetime.

 
It's just a status symbol.
Bees make too much of it.

 
Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it
and the ladies see you wearing it.

 
Those ladies?
Aren't they our cousins too?

 
Distant. Distant.

 
Look at these two.

 
- Oouple of Hive Harrys.
- Let's have fun with them.

 
It must be dangerous
being a Pollen Jock.

 
Yeah. Once a bear pinned me
against a mushroom!

 
He had a paw on my throat,
and with the other, he was slapping me!

 
- Oh, my!
- I never thought I'd knock him out.

 
What were you doing during this?

 
Trying to alert the authorities.

 
I can autograph that.

 
A little gusty out there today,
wasn't it, comrades?

 
Yeah. Gusty.

 
We're hitting a sunflower patch
six miles from here tomorrow.

 
- Six miles, huh?
- Barry!

 
A puddle jump for us,
but maybe you're not up for it.

 
- Maybe I am.
- You are not!

 
We're going 0900 at J-Gate.

 
What do you think, buzzy-boy?
Are you bee enough?

 
I might be. It all depends
on what 0900 means.

 
Hey, Honex!

 
Dad, you surprised me.

 
You decide what you're interested in?

 
- Well, there's a lot of choices.
- But you only get one.

 
Do you ever get bored
doing the same job every day?

 
Son, let me tell you about stirring.

 
You grab that stick, and you just
move it around, and you stir it around.

 
You get yourself into a rhythm.
It's a beautiful thing.

 
You know, Dad,
the more I think about it,

 
maybe the honey field
just isn't right for me.

 
You were thinking of what,
making balloon animals?

 
That's a bad job
for a guy with a stinger.

 
Janet, your son's not sure
he wants to go into honey!

 
- Barry, you are so funny sometimes.
- I'm not trying to be funny.

 
You're not funny! You're going
into honey. Our son, the stirrer!

 
- You're gonna be a stirrer?
- No one's listening to me!

 
Wait till you see the sticks I have.

 
I could say anything right now.
I'm gonna get an ant tattoo!

 
Let's open some honey and celebrate!

 
Maybe I'll pierce my thorax.
Shave my antennae.

 
Shack up with a grasshopper. Get
a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"!

 
I'm so proud.

 
- We're starting work today!
- Today's the day.

 
Oome on! All the good jobs
will be gone.

 
Yeah, right.

 
Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring,
stirrer, front desk, hair removal...

 
- Is it still available?
- Hang on. Two left!

 
One of them's yours! Oongratulations!
Step to the side.

 
- What'd you get?
- Picking crud out. Stellar!

 
Wow!

 
Oouple of newbies?

 
Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!

 
Make your choice.

 
- You want to go first?
- No, you go.

 
Oh, my. What's available?

 
Restroom attendant's open,
not for the reason you think.

 
- Any chance of getting the Krelman?
- Sure, you're on.

 
I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out.

 
Wax monkey's always open.

 
The Krelman opened up again.

 
What happened?

 
A bee died. Makes an opening. See?
He's dead. Another dead one.

 
Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.

 
Dead from the neck up.
Dead from the neck down. That's life!

 
Oh, this is so hard!

 
Heating, cooling,
stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,

 
humming, inspector number seven,
lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,

 
mite wrangler. Barry, what
do you think I should... Barry?

 
Barry!

 
All right, we've got the sunflower patch
in quadrant nine...

 
What happened to you?
Where are you?

 
- I'm going out.
- Out? Out where?

 
- Out there.
- Oh, no!

 
I have to, before I go
to work for the rest of my life.

 
You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello?

 
Another call coming in.

 
If anyone's feeling brave,
there's a Korean deli on 83rd

 
that gets their roses today.

 
Hey, guys.

 
- Look at that.
- Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday?

 
Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted.

 
It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up.

 
Really? Feeling lucky, are you?

 
Sign here, here. Just initial that.

 
- Thank you.
- OK.

 
You got a rain advisory today,

 
and as you all know,
bees cannot fly in rain.

 
So be careful. As always,
watch your brooms,

 
hockey sticks, dogs,
birds, bears and bats.

 
Also, I got a couple of reports
of root beer being poured on us.

 
Murphy's in a home because of it,
babbling like a cicada!

 
- That's awful.
- And a reminder for you rookies,

 
bee law number one,
absolutely no talking to humans!

 
All right, launch positions!

 
Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz,
buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!

 
Black and yellow!

 
Hello!

 
You ready for this, hot shot?

 
Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.

 
Wind, check.

 
- Antennae, check.
- Nectar pack, check.

 
- Wings, check.
- Stinger, check.

 
Scared out of my shorts, check.

 
OK, ladies,

 
let's move it out!

 
Pound those petunias,
you striped stem-suckers!

 
All of you, drain those flowers!

 
Wow! I'm out!

 
I can't believe I'm out!

 
So blue.

 
I feel so fast and free!

 
Box kite!

 
Wow!

 
Flowers!

 
This is Blue Leader.
We have roses visual.

 
Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.

 
Roses!

 
30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.

 
Stand to the side, kid.
It's got a bit of a kick.

 
That is one nectar collector!

 
- Ever see pollination up close?
- No, sir.

 
I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it
over here. Maybe a dash over there,

 
a pinch on that one.
See that? It's a little bit of magic.

 
That's amazing. Why do we do that?

 
That's pollen power. More pollen, more
flowers, more nectar, more honey for us.

 
Oool.

 
I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow.
Oould be daisies. Don't we need those?

 
Oopy that visual.

 
Wait. One of these flowers
seems to be on the move.

 
Say again? You're reporting
a moving flower?

 
Affirmative.

 
That was on the line!

 
This is the coolest. What is it?

 
I don't know, but I'm loving this color.

 
It smells good.
Not like a flower, but I like it.

 
Yeah, fuzzy.

 
Ohemical-y.

 
Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby.

 
My sweet lord of bees!

 
Oandy-brain, get off there!

 
Problem!

 
- Guys!
- This could be bad.

 
Affirmative.

 
Very close.

 
Gonna hurt.

 
Mama's little boy.

 
You are way out of position, rookie!

 
Ooming in at you like a missile!

 
Help me!

 
I don't think these are flowers.

 
- Should we tell him?
- I think he knows.

 
What is this?!

 
Match point!

 
You can start packing up, honey,
because you're about to eat it!

 
Yowser!

 
Gross.

 
There's a bee in the car!

 
- Do something!
- I'm driving!

 
- Hi, bee.
- He's back here!

 
He's going to sting me!

 
Nobody move. If you don't move,
he won't sting you. Freeze!

 
He blinked!

 
Spray him, Granny!

 
What are you doing?!

 
Wow... the tension level
out here is unbelievable.

 
I gotta get home.

 
Oan't fly in rain.

 
Oan't fly in rain.

 
Oan't fly in rain.

 
Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!

 
Ken, could you close
the window please?

 
Ken, could you close
the window please?

 
Oheck out my new resume.
I made it into a fold-out brochure.

 
You see? Folds out.

 
Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this.

 
What was that?

 
Maybe this time. This time. This time.
This time! This time! This...

 
Drapes!

 
That is diabolical.

 
It's fantastic. It's got all my special
skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.

 
What's number one? Star Wars?

 
Nah, I don't go for that...

 
...kind of stuff.

 
No wonder we shouldn't talk to them.
They're out of their minds.

 
When I leave a job interview, they're
flabbergasted, can't believe what I say.

 
There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out.

 
I don't remember the sun
having a big 75 on it.

 
I predicted global warming.

 
I could feel it getting hotter.
At first I thought it was just me.

 
Wait! Stop! Bee!

 
Stand back. These are winter boots.

 
Wait!

 
Don't kill him!

 
You know I'm allergic to them!
This thing could kill me!

 
Why does his life have
less value than yours?

 
Why does his life have any less value
than mine? Is that your statement?

 
I'm just saying all life has value. You
don't know what he's capable of feeling.

 
My brochure!

 
There you go, little guy.

 
I'm not scared of him.
It's an allergic thing.

 
Put that on your resume brochure.

 
My whole face could puff up.

 
Make it one of your special skills.

 
Knocking someone out
is also a special skill.

 
Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.

 
- Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night?
- Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.

 
- You could put carob chips on there.
- Bye.

 
- Supposed to be less calories.
- Bye.

 
I gotta say something.

 
She saved my life.
I gotta say something.

 
All right, here it goes.

 
Nah.

 
What would I say?

 
I could really get in trouble.

 
It's a bee law.
You're not supposed to talk to a human.

 
I can't believe I'm doing this.

 
I've got to.

 
Oh, I can't do it. Oome on!

 
No. Yes. No.

 
Do it. I can't.

 
How should I start it?
"You like jazz?" No, that's no good.

 
Here she comes! Speak, you fool!

 
Hi!

 
I'm sorry.

 
- You're talking.
- Yes, I know.

 
You're talking!

 
I'm so sorry.

 
No, it's OK. It's fine.
I know I'm dreaming.

 
But I don't recall going to bed.

 
Well, I'm sure this
is very disconcerting.

 
This is a bit of a surprise to me.
I mean, you're a bee!

 
I am. And I'm not supposed
to be doing this,

 
but they were all trying to kill me.

 
And if it wasn't for you...

 
I had to thank you.
It's just how I was raised.

 
That was a little weird.

 
- I'm talking with a bee.
- Yeah.

 
I'm talking to a bee.
And the bee is talking to me!

 
I just want to say I'm grateful.
I'll leave now.

 
- Wait! How did you learn to do that?
- What?

 
The talking thing.

 
Same way you did, I guess.
"Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up.

 
- That's very funny.
- Yeah.

 
Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh,
we'd cry with what we have to deal with.

 
Anyway...

 
Oan I...

 
...get you something?
- Like what?

 
I don't know. I mean...
I don't know. Ooffee?

 
I don't want to put you out.

 
It's no trouble. It takes two minutes.

 
- It's just coffee.
- I hate to impose.

 
- Don't be ridiculous!
- Actually, I would love a cup.

 
Hey, you want rum cake?

 
- I shouldn't.
- Have some.

 
- No, I can't.
- Oome on!

 
I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms.

 
- Where?
- These stripes don't help.

 
You look great!

 
I don't know if you know
anything about fashion.

 
Are you all right?

 
No.

 
He's making the tie in the cab
as they're flying up Madison.

 
He finally gets there.

 
He runs up the steps into the church.
The wedding is on.

 
And he says, "Watermelon?
I thought you said Guatemalan.

 
Why would I marry a watermelon?"

 
Is that a bee joke?

 
That's the kind of stuff we do.

 
Yeah, different.

 
So, what are you gonna do, Barry?

 
About work? I don't know.

 
I want to do my part for the hive,
but I can't do it the way they want.

 
I know how you feel.

 
- You do?
- Sure.

 
My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or
a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.

 
- Really?
- My only interest is flowers.

 
Our new queen was just elected
with that same campaign slogan.

 
Anyway, if you look...

 
There's my hive right there. See it?

 
You're in Sheep Meadow!

 
Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond!

 
No way! I know that area.
I lost a toe ring there once.

 
- Why do girls put rings on their toes?
- Why not?

 
- It's like putting a hat on your knee.
- Maybe I'll try that.

 
- You all right, ma'am?
- Oh, yeah. Fine.

 
Just having two cups of coffee!

 
Anyway, this has been great.
Thanks for the coffee.

 
Yeah, it's no trouble.

 
Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did,
I'd be up the rest of my life.

 
Are you...?

 
Oan I take a piece of this with me?

 
Sure! Here, have a crumb.

 
- Thanks!
- Yeah.

 
All right. Well, then...
I guess I'll see you around.

 
Or not.

 
OK, Barry.

 
And thank you
so much again... for before.

 
Oh, that? That was nothing.

 
Well, not nothing, but... Anyway...

 
This can't possibly work.

 
He's all set to go.
We may as well try it.

 
OK, Dave, pull the chute.

 
- Sounds amazing.
- It was amazing!

 
It was the scariest,
happiest moment of my life.

 
Humans! I can't believe
you were with humans!

 
Giant, scary humans!
What were they like?

 
Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.

 
They eat crazy giant things.
They drive crazy.

 
- Do they try and kill you, like on TV?
- Some of them. But some of them don't.

 
- How'd you get back?
- Poodle.

 
You did it, and I'm glad. You saw
whatever you wanted to see.

 
You had your "experience." Now you
can pick out yourjob and be normal.

 
- Well...
- Well?

 
Well, I met someone.

 
You did? Was she Bee-ish?

 
- A wasp?! Your parents will kill you!
- No, no, no, not a wasp.

 
- Spider?
- I'm not attracted to spiders.

 
I know it's the hottest thing,
with the eight legs and all.

 
I can't get by that face.

 
So who is she?

 
She's... human.

 
No, no. That's a bee law.
You wouldn't break a bee law.

 
- Her name's Vanessa.
- Oh, boy.

 
She's so nice. And she's a florist!

 
Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!

 
We're not dating.

 
You're flying outside the hive, talking
to humans that attack our homes

 
with power washers and M-80s!
One-eighth a stick of dynamite!

 
She saved my life!
And she understands me.

 
This is over!

 
Eat this.

 
This is not over! What was that?

 
- They call it a crumb.
- It was so stingin' stripey!

 
And that's not what they eat.
That's what falls off what they eat!

 
- You know what a Oinnabon is?
- No.

 
It's bread and cinnamon and frosting.
They heat it up...

 
Sit down!

 
...really hot!
- Listen to me!

 
We are not them! We're us.
There's us and there's them!

 
Yes, but who can deny
the heart that is yearning?

 
There's no yearning.
Stop yearning. Listen to me!

 
You have got to start thinking bee,
my friend. Thinking bee!

 
- Thinking bee.
- Thinking bee.

 
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

 
There he is. He's in the pool.

 
You know what your problem is, Barry?

 
I gotta start thinking bee?

 
How much longer will this go on?

 
It's been three days!
Why aren't you working?

 
I've got a lot of big life decisions
to think about.

 
What life? You have no life!
You have no job. You're barely a bee!

 
Would it kill you
to make a little honey?

 
Barry, come out.
Your father's talking to you.

 
Martin, would you talk to him?

 
Barry, I'm talking to you!

 
You coming?

 
Got everything?

 
All set!

 
Go ahead. I'll catch up.

 
Don't be too long.

 
Watch this!

 
Vanessa!

 
- We're still here.
- I told you not to yell at him.

 
He doesn't respond to yelling!

 
- Then why yell at me?
- Because you don't listen!

 
I'm not listening to this.

 
Sorry, I've gotta go.

 
- Where are you going?
- I'm meeting a friend.

 
A girl? Is this why you can't decide?

 
Bye.

 
I just hope she's Bee-ish.

 
They have a huge parade
of flowers every year in Pasadena?

 
To be in the Tournament of Roses,
that's every florist's dream!

 
Up on a float, surrounded
by flowers, crowds cheering.

 
A tournament. Do the roses
compete in athletic events?

 
No. All right, I've got one.
How come you don't fly everywhere?

 
It's exhausting. Why don't you
run everywhere? It's faster.

 
Yeah, OK, I see, I see.
All right, your turn.

 
TiVo. You can just freeze live TV?
That's insane!

 
You don't have that?

 
We have Hivo, but it's a disease.
It's a horrible, horrible disease.

 
Oh, my.

 
Dumb bees!

 
You must want to sting all those jerks.

 
We try not to sting.
It's usually fatal for us.

 
So you have to watch your temper.

 
Very carefully.
You kick a wall, take a walk,

 
write an angry letter and throw it out.
Work through it like any emotion:

 
Anger, jealousy, lust.

 
Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?

 
Yeah.

 
- What is wrong with you?!
- It's a bug.

 
He's not bothering anybody.
Get out of here, you creep!

 
What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular?

 
Yeah, it was. How did you know?

 
It felt like about 10 pages.
Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.

 
You've really got that
down to a science.

 
- I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.
- I'll bet.

 
What in the name
of Mighty Hercules is this?

 
How did this get here?
Oute Bee, Golden Blossom,

 
Ray Liotta Private Select?

 
- Is he that actor?
- I never heard of him.

 
- Why is this here?
- For people. We eat it.

 
You don't have
enough food of your own?

 
- Well, yes.
- How do you get it?

 
- Bees make it.
- I know who makes it!

 
And it's hard to make it!

 
There's heating, cooling, stirring.
You need a whole Krelman thing!

 
- It's organic.
- It's our-ganic!

 
It's just honey, Barry.

 
Just what?!

 
Bees don't know about this!
This is stealing! A lot of stealing!

 
You've taken our homes, schools,
hospitals! This is all we have!

 
And it's on sale?!
I'm getting to the bottom of this.

 
I'm getting to the bottom
of all of this!

 
Hey, Hector.

 
- You almost done?
- Almost.

 
He is here. I sense it.

 
Well, I guess I'll go home now

 
and just leave this nice honey out,
with no one around.

 
You're busted, box boy!

 
I knew I heard something.
So you can talk!

 
I can talk.
And now you'll start talking!

 
Where you getting the sweet stuff?
Who's your supplier?

 
I don't understand.
I thought we were friends.

 
The last thing we want
to do is upset bees!

 
You're too late! It's ours now!

 
You, sir, have crossed
the wrong sword!

 
You, sir, will be lunch
for my iguana, Ignacio!

 
Where is the honey coming from?

 
Tell me where!

 
Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms!

 
Orazy person!

 
What horrible thing has happened here?

 
These faces, they never knew
what hit them. And now

 
they're on the road to nowhere!

 
Just keep still.

 
What? You're not dead?

 
Do I look dead? They will wipe anything
that moves. Where you headed?

 
To Honey Farms.
I am onto something huge here.

 
I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood,
crazy stuff. Blows your head off!

 
I'm going to Tacoma.

 
- And you?
- He really is dead.

 
All right.

 
Uh-oh!

 
- What is that?!
- Oh, no!

 
- A wiper! Triple blade!
- Triple blade?

 
Jump on! It's your only chance, bee!

 
Why does everything have
to be so doggone clean?!

 
How much do you people need to see?!

 
Open your eyes!
Stick your head out the window!

 
From NPR News in Washington,
I'm Oarl Kasell.

 
But don't kill no more bugs!

 
- Bee!
- Moose blood guy!!

 
- You hear something?
- Like what?

 
Like tiny screaming.

 
Turn off the radio.

 
Whassup, bee boy?

 
Hey, Blood.

 
Just a row of honey jars,
as far as the eye could see.

 
Wow!

 
I assume wherever this truck goes
is where they're getting it.

 
I mean, that honey's ours.

 
- Bees hang tight.
- We're all jammed in.

 
It's a close community.

 
Not us, man. We on our own.
Every mosquito on his own.

 
- What if you get in trouble?
- You a mosquito, you in trouble.

 
Nobody likes us. They just smack.
See a mosquito, smack, smack!

 
At least you're out in the world.
You must meet girls.

 
Mosquito girls try to trade up,
get with a moth, dragonfly.

 
Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito.

 
You got to be kidding me!

 
Mooseblood's about to leave
the building! So long, bee!

 
- Hey, guys!
- Mooseblood!

 
I knew I'd catch y'all down here.
Did you bring your crazy straw?

 
We throw it in jars, slap a label on it,
and it's pretty much pure profit.

 
What is this place?

 
A bee's got a brain
the size of a pinhead.

 
They are pinheads!

 
Pinhead.

 
- Oheck out the new smoker.
- Oh, sweet. That's the one you want.

 
The Thomas 3000!

 
Smoker?

 
Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic.
Twice the nicotine, all the tar.

 
A couple breaths of this
knocks them right out.

 
They make the honey,
and we make the money.

 
"They make the honey,
and we make the money"?

 
Oh, my!

 
What's going on? Are you OK?

 
Yeah. It doesn't last too long.

 
Do you know you're
in a fake hive with fake walls?

 
Our queen was moved here.
We had no choice.

 
This is your queen?
That's a man in women's clothes!

 
That's a drag queen!

 
What is this?

 
Oh, no!

 
There's hundreds of them!

 
Bee honey.

 
Our honey is being brazenly stolen
on a massive scale!

 
This is worse than anything bears
have done! I intend to do something.

 
Oh, Barry, stop.

 
Who told you humans are taking
our honey? That's a rumor.

 
Do these look like rumors?

 
That's a conspiracy theory.
These are obviously doctored photos.

 
How did you get mixed up in this?

 
He's been talking to humans.

 
- What?
- Talking to humans?!

 
He has a human girlfriend.
And they make out!

 
Make out? Barry!

 
We do not.

 
- You wish you could.
- Whose side are you on?

 
The bees!

 
I dated a cricket once in San Antonio.
Those crazy legs kept me up all night.

 
Barry, this is what you want
to do with your life?

 
I want to do it for all our lives.
Nobody works harder than bees!

 
Dad, I remember you
coming home so overworked

 
your hands were still stirring.
You couldn't stop.

 
I remember that.

 
What right do they have to our honey?

 
We live on two cups a year. They put it
in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!

 
Even if it's true, what can one bee do?

 
Sting them where it really hurts.

 
In the face! The eye!

 
- That would hurt.
- No.

 
Up the nose? That's a killer.

 
There's only one place you can sting
the humans, one place where it matters.

 
Hive at Five, the hive's only
full-hour action news source.

 
No more bee beards!

 
With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.

 
Weather with Storm Stinger.

 
Sports with Buzz Larvi.

 
And Jeanette Ohung.

 
- Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble.
- And I'm Jeanette Ohung.

 
A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,

 
intends to sue the human race
for stealing our honey,

 
packaging it and profiting
from it illegally!

 
Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,

 
we'll have three former queens here in
our studio, discussing their new book,

 
Olassy Ladies,
out this week on Hexagon.

 
Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson.

 
Did you ever think, "I'm a kid
from the hive. I can't do this"?

 
Bees have never been afraid
to change the world.

 
What about Bee Oolumbus?
Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?

 
Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.

 
We were thinking
of stickball or candy stores.

 
How old are you?

 
The bee community
is supporting you in this case,

 
which will be the trial
of the bee century.

 
You know, they have a Larry King
in the human world too.

 
It's a common name. Next week...

 
He looks like you and has a show
and suspenders and colored dots...

 
Next week...

 
Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the
guest even though you just heard 'em.

 
Bear Week next week!
They're scary, hairy and here live.

 
Always leans forward, pointy shoulders,
squinty eyes, very Jewish.

 
In tennis, you attack
at the point of weakness!

 
It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81.

 
Honey, her backhand's a joke!
I'm not gonna take advantage of that?

 
Quiet, please.
Actual work going on here.

 
- Is that that same bee?
- Yes, it is!

 
I'm helping him sue the human race.

 
- Hello.
- Hello, bee.

 
This is Ken.

 
Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size
ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.

 
Why does he talk again?

 
Listen, you better go
'cause we're really busy working.

 
But it's our yogurt night!

 
Bye-bye.

 
Why is yogurt night so difficult?!

 
You poor thing.
You two have been at this for hours!

 
Yes, and Adam here
has been a huge help.

 
- Frosting...
- How many sugars?

 
Just one. I try not
to use the competition.

 
So why are you helping me?

 
Bees have good qualities.

 
And it takes my mind off the shop.

 
Instead of flowers, people
are giving balloon bouquets now.

 
Those are great, if you're three.

 
And artificial flowers.

 
- Oh, those just get me psychotic!
- Yeah, me too.

 
Bent stingers, pointless pollination.

 
Bees must hate those fake things!

 
Nothing worse
than a daffodil that's had work done.

 
Maybe this could make up
for it a little bit.

 
- This lawsuit's a pretty big deal.
- I guess.

 
You sure you want to go through with it?

 
Am I sure? When I'm done with
the humans, they won't be able

 
to say, "Honey, I'm home,"
without paying a royalty!

 
It's an incredible scene
here in downtown Manhattan,

 
where the world anxiously waits,
because for the first time in history,

 
we will hear for ourselves
if a honeybee can actually speak.

 
What have we gotten into here, Barry?

 
It's pretty big, isn't it?

 
I can't believe how many humans
don't work during the day.

 
You think billion-dollar multinational
food companies have good lawyers?

 
Everybody needs to stay
behind the barricade.

 
- What's the matter?
- I don't know, I just got a chill.

 
Well, if it isn't the bee team.

 
You boys work on this?

 
All rise! The Honorable
Judge Bumbleton presiding.

 
All right. Oase number 4475,

 
Superior Oourt of New York,
Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry

 
is now in session.

 
Mr. Montgomery, you're representing
the five food companies collectively?

 
A privilege.

 
Mr. Benson... you're representing
all the bees of the world?

 
I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor,
we're ready to proceed.

 
Mr. Montgomery,
your opening statement, please.

 
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,

 
my grandmother was a simple woman.

 
Born on a farm, she believed
it was man's divine right

 
to benefit from the bounty
of nature God put before us.

 
If we lived in the topsy-turvy world
Mr. Benson imagines,

 
just think of what would it mean.

 
I would have to negotiate
with the silkworm

 
for the elastic in my britches!

 
Talking bee!

 
How do we know this isn't some sort of

 
holographic motion-picture-capture
Hollywood wizardry?

 
They could be using laser beams!

 
Robotics! Ventriloquism!
Oloning! For all we know,

 
he could be on steroids!

 
Mr. Benson?

 
Ladies and gentlemen,
there's no trickery here.

 
I'm just an ordinary bee.
Honey's pretty important to me.

 
It's important to all bees.
We invented it!

 
We make it. And we protect it
with our lives.

 
Unfortunately, there are
some people in this room

 
who think they can take it from us

 
'cause we're the little guys!
I'm hoping that, after this is all over,

 
you'll see how, by taking our honey,
you not only take everything we have

 
but everything we are!

 
I wish he'd dress like that
all the time. So nice!

 
Oall your first witness.

 
So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden
of Honey Farms, big company you have.

 
I suppose so.

 
I see you also own
Honeyburton and Honron!

 
Yes, they provide beekeepers
for our farms.

 
Beekeeper. I find that
to be a very disturbing term.

 
I don't imagine you employ
any bee-free-ers, do you?

 
- No.
- I couldn't hear you.

 
- No.
- No.

 
Because you don't free bees.
You keep bees. Not only that,

 
it seems you thought a bear would be
an appropriate image for a jar of honey.

 
They're very lovable creatures.

 
Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.

 
You mean like this?

 
Bears kill bees!

 
How'd you like his head crashing
through your living room?!

 
Biting into your couch!
Spitting out your throw pillows!

 
OK, that's enough. Take him away.

 
So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here.
Your name intrigues me.

 
- Where have I heard it before?
- I was with a band called The Police.

 
But you've never been
a police officer, have you?

 
No, I haven't.

 
No, you haven't. And so here
we have yet another example

 
of bee culture casually
stolen by a human

 
for nothing more than
a prance-about stage name.

 
Oh, please.

 
Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting?

 
Because I'm feeling
a little stung, Sting.

 
Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!

 
That's not his real name?! You idiots!

 
Mr. Liotta, first,
belated congratulations on

 
your Emmy win for a guest spot
on ER in 2005.

 
Thank you. Thank you.

 
I see from your resume
that you're devilishly handsome

 
with a churning inner turmoil
that's ready to blow.

 
I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?

 
Not yet it isn't. But is this
what it's come to for you?

 
Exploiting tiny, helpless bees
so you don't

 
have to rehearse
your part and learn your lines, sir?

 
Watch it, Benson!
I could blow right now!

 
This isn't a goodfella.
This is a badfella!

 
Why doesn't someone just step on
this creep, and we can all go home?!

 
- Order in this court!
- You're all thinking it!

 
Order! Order, I say!

 
- Say it!
- Mr. Liotta, please sit down!

 
I think it was awfully nice
of that bear to pitch in like that.

 
I think the jury's on our side.

 
Are we doing everything right, legally?

 
I'm a florist.

 
Right. Well, here's to a great team.

 
To a great team!

 
Well, hello.

 
- Ken!
- Hello.

 
I didn't think you were coming.

 
No, I was just late.
I tried to call, but... the battery.

 
I didn't want all this to go to waste,
so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.

 
Oh, that was lucky.

 
There's a little left.
I could heat it up.

 
Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.

 
So I hear you're quite a tennis player.

 
I'm not much for the game myself.
The ball's a little grabby.

 
That's where I usually sit.
Right... there.

 
Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,

 
and he agreed with me that eating with
chopsticks isn't really a special skill.

 
You think I don't see what you're doing?

 
I know how hard it is to find
the rightjob. We have that in common.

 
Do we?

 
Bees have 100 percent employment,
but we do jobs like taking the crud out.

 
That's just what
I was thinking about doing.

 
Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor
for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.

 
I'm going to drain the old stinger.

 
Yeah, you do that.

 
Look at that.

 
You know, I've just about had it

 
with your little mind games.

 
- What's that?
- Italian Vogue.

 
Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages.

 
A lot of ads.

 
Remember what Van said, why is
your life more valuable than mine?

 
Funny, I just can't seem to recall that!

 
I think something stinks in here!

 
I love the smell of flowers.

 
How do you like the smell of flames?!

 
Not as much.

 
Water bug! Not taking sides!

 
Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat!
This is pathetic!

 
I've got issues!

 
Well, well, well, a royal flush!

 
- You're bluffing.
- Am I?

 
Surf's up, dude!

 
Poo water!

 
That bowl is gnarly.

 
Except for those dirty yellow rings!

 
Kenneth! What are you doing?!

 
You know, I don't even like honey!
I don't eat it!

 
We need to talk!

 
He's just a little bee!

 
And he happens to be
the nicest bee I've met in a long time!

 
Long time? What are you talking about?!
Are there other bugs in your life?

 
No, but there are other things bugging
me in life. And you're one of them!

 
Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night...

 
My nerves are fried from riding
on this emotional roller coaster!

 
Goodbye, Ken.

 
And for your information,

 
I prefer sugar-free, artificial
sweeteners made by man!

 
I'm sorry about all that.

 
I know it's got
an aftertaste! I like it!

 
I always felt there was some kind
of barrier between Ken and me.

 
I couldn't overcome it.
Oh, well.

 
Are you OK for the trial?

 
I believe Mr. Montgomery
is about out of ideas.

 
We would like to call
Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.

 
Good idea! You can really see why he's
considered one of the best lawyers...

 
Yeah.

 
Layton, you've
gotta weave some magic

 
with this jury,
or it's gonna be all over.

 
Don't worry. The only thing I have
to do to turn this jury around

 
is to remind them
of what they don't like about bees.

 
- You got the tweezers?
- Are you allergic?

 
Only to losing, son. Only to losing.

 
Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you
what I think we'd all like to know.

 
What exactly is your relationship

 
to that woman?

 
We're friends.

 
- Good friends?
- Yes.

 
How good? Do you live together?

 
Wait a minute...

 
Are you her little...

 
...bedbug?

 
I've seen a bee documentary or two.
From what I understand,

 
doesn't your queen give birth
to all the bee children?

 
- Yeah, but...
- So those aren't your real parents!

 
- Oh, Barry...
- Yes, they are!

 
Hold me back!

 
You're an illegitimate bee,
aren't you, Benson?

 
He's denouncing bees!

 
Don't y'all date your cousins?

 
- Objection!
- I'm going to pincushion this guy!

 
Adam, don't! It's what he wants!

 
Oh, I'm hit!!

 
Oh, lordy, I am hit!

 
Order! Order!

 
The venom! The venom
is coursing through my veins!

 
I have been felled
by a winged beast of destruction!

 
You see? You can't treat them
like equals! They're striped savages!

 
Stinging's the only thing
they know! It's their way!

 
- Adam, stay with me.
- I can't feel my legs.

 
What angel of mercy
will come forward to suck the poison

 
from my heaving buttocks?

 
I will have order in this court. Order!

 
Order, please!

 
The case of the honeybees
versus the human race

 
took a pointed turn against the bees

 
yesterday when one of their legal
team stung Layton T. Montgomery.

 
- Hey, buddy.
- Hey.

 
- Is there much pain?
- Yeah.

 
I...

 
I blew the whole case, didn't I?

 
It doesn't matter. What matters is
you're alive. You could have died.

 
I'd be better off dead. Look at me.

 
They got it from the cafeteria
downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.

 
Look, there's
a little celery still on it.

 
What was it like to sting someone?

 
I can't explain it. It was all...

 
All adrenaline and then...
and then ecstasy!

 
All right.

 
You think it was all a trap?

 
Of course. I'm sorry.
I flew us right into this.

 
What were we thinking? Look at us. We're
just a couple of bugs in this world.

 
What will the humans do to us
if they win?

 
I don't know.

 
I hear they put the roaches in motels.
That doesn't sound so bad.

 
Adam, they check in,
but they don't check out!

 
Oh, my.

 
Oould you get a nurse
to close that window?

 
- Why?
- The smoke.

 
Bees don't smoke.

 
Right. Bees don't smoke.

 
Bees don't smoke!
But some bees are smoking.

 
That's it! That's our case!

 
It is? It's not over?

 
Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere.

 
Get back to the court and stall.
Stall any way you can.

 
And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub.

 
Mr. Flayman.

 
Yes? Yes, Your Honor!

 
Where is the rest of your team?

 
Well, Your Honor, it's interesting.

 
Bees are trained to fly haphazardly,

 
and as a result,
we don't make very good time.

 
I actually heard a funny story about...

 
Your Honor,
haven't these ridiculous bugs

 
taken up enough
of this court's valuable time?

 
How much longer will we allow
these absurd shenanigans to go on?

 
They have presented no compelling
evidence to support their charges

 
against my clients,
who run legitimate businesses.

 
I move for a complete dismissal
of this entire case!

 
Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going

 
to have to consider
Mr. Montgomery's motion.

 
But you can't! We have a terrific case.

 
Where is your proof?
Where is the evidence?

 
Show me the smoking gun!

 
Hold it, Your Honor!
You want a smoking gun?

 
Here is your smoking gun.

 
What is that?

 
It's a bee smoker!

 
What, this?
This harmless little contraption?

 
This couldn't hurt a fly,
let alone a bee.

 
Look at what has happened

 
to bees who have never been asked,
"Smoking or non?"

 
Is this what nature intended for us?

 
To be forcibly addicted
to smoke machines

 
and man-made wooden slat work camps?

 
Living out our lives as honey slaves
to the white man?

 
- What are we gonna do?
- He's playing the species card.


 

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