Author Topic: [ it's all decided for us - writing dump ]  (Read 209 times)

Offline elysian.

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[ it's all decided for us - writing dump ]
« on: November 24, 2018, 08:03:31 PM »
alright my writing is absolute shit so this is me trying to improve it. feel free to track or give prompt ideas. i love attention so lmao
inny's writing dump

Offline elysian.

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Re: [ it's all decided for us - writing dump ]
« Reply #1 on: November 24, 2018, 09:07:01 PM »
foxwell made this bitch
imageyeet
yeet
"twisted nerve" | luka fox | murder inspo
there were lots of things that luka didn’t understand about other people. he didn’t understand why they went to bars and would drink their weight in alcohol until they couldn’t walk straight anymore. there didn’t seem to be anything fun to him about drunkenness; why would anyone want to dull their senses and delay their thinking in such a way? that didn't sound like fun. that also wasn’t the only thing that puzzled him, though. their sudden willingness to go home with a complete and utter stranger always baffled him. all it took was a pretty face and a few sweet words, and then suddenly they’d naively, ingeniously follow that pretty face out of the bar, away from others, and into the privacy of this stranger’s home.

he also didn’t understand why they liked trying to shove their tongues down someone's throat.

the taste of alcohol was excruciatingly overwhelming, to the point that luka even wondered if this was worth the end result. the minute he’d opened this door, the guy had basically thrown himself at the blonde, crashed their lips together, and immediately tried to take control of the situation. good god, some people had no restraint. the blonde was resisting the urge to shove this man off of him. this guy seemed to think he had the upper hand as he slammed the blonde’s back against a nearby wall. that was cute.

suddenly, the man moved away, clamped his hand over his mouth, and anxiously asked, “where’s your bathroom?” leaning back, the blond pointed before the stranger then made a mad sprint in that direction. the sound of someone puking their guts out might have disgusted any regular person, but luka was unfazed. suddenly, not so cute. after a moment of simply staring up at the wall, he dug in his pocket to take out a pack of cigarettes. lighting one up for himself, he then sauntered into the living room and collapsed on the couch. personally, luka despised cigarettes-- but he’d seen this man smoking before entering the bar, could smell the cigarette smoke. might as well relate to the guy to make himself more likable, he supposed.

minutes passed before the man came out of the bathroom, a low grunt passing his lips as he collapsed on the couch beside luka. “shit, i’m sorry.” silently, luka held out a cigarette for the man to take, lighting it after he’d grasped it. “i’ve never- gotten this drunk before.” the blond almost wanted to roll his eyes. he’d seen the man go into this bar many times before. he’d seen him pick up a random stranger every night and leave drunk off his ass. this guy wasn’t talking to an idiot. this habit made him an easy victim; if he picked up a random stranger every night, who could know for sure who he went home with?

“it’s fine.”
his head wandered around to look at the furniture, all covered by a white cloth. “y’just move in here?” a curt nod seemed to be the only answer he needed.
the man seemed unfazed by the quiet, and instead continued his smoke. after a final drag, luka released the smoke as he burnt the cigarette out on his coffee table. with a smirk, the stranger beside him followed suit, seeming to find amusement in the slight destruction of the coffee table. on his way back, his hand settled on luka’s thigh. “alright. where were we, cupcake?” the blonde tried not to cringe as the words were followed by a hand sliding further up his thigh and--

luka stood up abruptly.

“do you like music?” the question caught the man off guard, who merely nodded wordlessly. luka stood there for a moment before nodding his head back, and heading towards the stereo on the other side of the room. taking out a disc, he inserted it. moments later the room was filled with a very familiar tune; september. blue eyes looked at the figure on the couch, and something had ignited in those blue hues. a change in demeanor with a flick of a switch. “earth, wind, & fire. classic, right?” as he started to walk away from the stereo, hips swaying slightly to the tune, the man seemed ready for luka to climb right into his lap-- only to be taken completely by surprise as the blond sauntered past, a sultry hand trailing along the man’s shoulder the only touch given.

stepping into the kitchen, he began to open cabinet drawers nonchalantly, seemingly looking for something. the drunken man simply slouching in his seat, smirking. “you like to play hard to get, huh?” chuckling, he stared up at the ceiling, “sexy fox.” a fake, soft laugh passed luka’s lips, light and flirty, as he then rolled his eyes moments later.

“the twenty-first night of september…” luka hummed, sliding the drawer closed. “why not the twenty-second? ever wonder that?” eyes lighting up from a brilliant idea, he spun and headed towards a cabinet. “i know why.” the cabinet opened to reveal an artillery of weapons. pursing his lips in thought, he settled for dragging out the first thing that caught his eye.
“really? what's the reason, kitten?”

sauntering over towards the doorway between the kitchen and the living room, a laugh escaped him- crazed, and insanely amused. “there is no reason! they just thought it was catchy.” laughing again, he held up his weapon of choice, a chainsaw, and investigated it nonchalantly. “isn’t that just hilarious? people spending their whole lives wondering over some insignificant detail about a song, and it means nothing?”

now was when the man decided to be nervous. “hey, y’know, kitten, i think that i should get going, i-” the moment he turned around to face the blonde, the chainsaw roared to life. the man only had time to scream before the machine went slicing through his head, silencing any sound that was meant to escape.
“don’t be so quick to leave, kitten.” he erupted with laughter, the noise drowned out by the blaring music as he continued to slash his victim. blood poured out onto the furniture covering, sprayed over luka’s face and clothes. all he could do was laugh as he continued to distort the body until it was unrecognizable.

ba de ya, never was a cloudy day…


« Last Edit: November 27, 2018, 03:08:50 PM by inny. »

Offline elysian.

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Re: [ it's all decided for us - writing dump ]
« Reply #2 on: November 25, 2018, 05:32:17 PM »
foxwell made this bitch
imageyeet
yeet
"sweetheart" | roylie | cuddling inspo
rory could get used to moments like this. careful fingers skimmed along the expanse of pale, beautiful skin, green eyes watching as charlie's chest peacefully rose and fell. his other hand was tangled in soft dark locks while the former settled in the dip of charlie's side with practiced ease. there wasn’t any other way he’d rather spend his time. with tangled legs, holding each other so close the redhead didn't know where one ended and where the other began. he preferred it that way. tilting his head just enough to press his lips to charlie’s own, albeit only briefly, he felt a smile make its way to his lips. he relaxed with ease into the moment, eyes closing as he slowly began to drift to sleep-

until he felt the shifting of sheets, and the shuffle of charlie slowly moving away from him. “not gonna happen, sweetheart,” the words spilled out nonchalantly as arms were quick to pull charlie back close to him again. he could hear the soft, airy laughter from sweetheart, from charlie, as he once again tried to retaliate. “charlie!” laughing, he rolled on top of the other, sandwiching him between the mattress and the redhead. “can’t you just stay still for me, for once?”
“i swear if i stay here any longer i’m never gonna leave this bed. will you just move?”

the answer honestly didn’t surprise rory at this point. all it caused was a fond roll of his eyes and a shake of his head. for a moment, he pursed his lips in thought, as if considering charlie’s request. however, weighing the pros and cons, it didn’t take him too long to decide. “sorry, no can do.” the remark was met with a scoff, the smaller relaxing underneath rory.

amused emerald met amused ocean-blues, and rory felt like his heart was melting all over again. damn, did charlie even know what he did to him? did charlie ever realize that he was the center of rory’s life, the only person that rory could ever pour everything out to? rory had lost so much throughout the recent years; however, charlie had quickly became his rock, there for him more than anyone else he’d ever had in his life. and rory was forever grateful. “are you going to take care of me when i’m forever stuck in this bed, then?”

the soft, amused words brought him out of his daydream. after the humor lit a spark in his eyes, he felt himself sober up enough to look charlie in the eyes, pressing a kiss to his lips before uttering, "i'll always take care of you." for once, the sappy remark didn’t earn a scoff or laugh, or a roll of the eyes. instead it was merely the beautiful spark in those ocean eyes and a soft smile almost out of disbelief, not believing that someone would care so much. after all charlie had been through, who could blame him for not being able to wrap his mind around someone so ever-present? rory was someone who was here for the long-haul.

“always,” rory whispered, eyes searching charlie’s before closing the distance between them, lips and bodies falling perfectly together, and rory falling deeper and deeper into the all-encompassing love that he could only find in charlie.

« Last Edit: November 26, 2018, 07:34:51 AM by inny. »

Offline elysian.

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Re: [ it's all decided for us - writing dump ]
« Reply #3 on: April 14, 2019, 11:59:14 AM »
foxwell made this bitch
imageyeet
yeet
"against the tides" | harrison rose
when the leader of a notorious gang asks to talk with you, you generally did exactly what they said. when they told you to tell absolutely no one about the circumstance, you also kept your lips sealed. it hadn’t been too hard to duck out of the apartment without any questions asked- and even if someone had questioned, he would’ve had an excuse ready. harrison hadn’t been in the gang for that long, barely even a month, but he felt like a month was long enough to know that the leader was someone to be feared and respected. the leader was also someone that harris had learned to stay away from unless it was absolutely necessary. walking along the empty alleyway, the sun almost vanishing as it set in the horizon, the dirty blonde shoved his hands in his pockets and hastened his brisk walk.

he always felt uncomfortable walking on his own. usually he’d have mickey escort him, or ellie. the carbines, although they offered the rose siblings and mickey refuge and safety - everything they wanted - harrison was quick to figure out that came with a price. not everything was sunshine and rainbows here. when mickey had brought him and ellie to the carbines, he’d been quick to accept any kind of safety from the clearwaters. he never quite felt like he fit in, though. there were people who were at each other’s throats, fighting each other in the streets as others cheered them on. fighting. harris knew he hadn’t fit in with those people, but he’d been quick to befriend some of the mothers and would frequently babysit their children. he belonged there, with the mothers and their sweet innocent kids.

he did not belong at the gang leader’s doorstep, knocking hesitantly before waiting. the door had opened almost before he’d finished knocking, by two men- ah. mickey’s friends. he couldn’t help but feel his shoulders relax, a look of relief washing over his features. “hi, tom. john.” although harrison had felt a bit more at ease, now, a small smile on his features, it felt like tom and john were on strictly business. they gave a solemn nod of their heads in acknowledgement before tom held the door open for harrison to come in. the smile that had briefly been there vanished. smiles never got to last very long, anymore.

stepping in, he then followed slowly behind the two men as they led him further into the house. and, sure enough, there he was, seated at a table in what would’ve been a dining room of sorts. caine. upon seeing harrison, the man straightened, a small easy smirk on his features. “harrison,” gesturing towards the seat directly in front of him, he said, “sit down. we have so much to talk about.” when the dirty blonde hesitated, caine let out a bit of laughter - far from kind. cold and demeaning. “c’mon, sit. i won’t hurt you. yet.” while the threat hung ominously in the air, tom and john laughed along with caine who found more amusement in the remark than anything. harrison decided he didn’t really have a choice but to sit down.

“want a smoke?”
“no, thank you.”
“drink?”
“no. but thanks.”

the leader stared at him for a moment as he took a cigarette out of his coat pocket, eyeing him as he placed it between his mouth and lit it. harrison turned his gaze down towards the table, anxiously wringing his hands in his lap. caine took a brief drag of the cigarette before he let the smoke out, blowing it across the table at harrison. the stale smell of cigarettes made him feel like he was going to be sick. “let’s cut to the chase, then.” he pointed his cigarette at harrison, settling in silence for a moment before saying, “i like you, harrison. you’ve got a lot of potential. like that about you.” the relief was evident in harrison’s features, the man taking a deep breath as he straightened just slightly in his seat. thank god. he thought he was going to be berated about what he’d been doing at the gang; instead, he was getting praised. being praised by a man with such power… it made him feel almost a little sheepish.
he uttered a quiet, “thank you. it means-”

“ah-ah-ah,” caine suddenly caught him off, lifting a finger up as he interjected. “i wasn’t done.” harrison couldn’t help but slouch a bit more in his seat, feeling like if he slouched enough he’d almost be invisible. “you’re doing great things. mickey is doing great things. but ellie- do you think ellie is doing as well as you and mickey?”

for a moment, harrison could only stare at him, eyes widened slightly in shock. snapping out of it, he quickly chimed in, “i mean- she’s doing what she can. and then some. i think she has more potential than i--”

“kill her.”

it felt like caine had single handedly knocked the wind out of him with that statement. kill- ellie? his sister? he had to have misheard him. in disbelief, he finally met caine’s gaze as he tried to process what had just been said. “what?”
“we want you to kill ellie. frankly, she’s not going to amount to anything with the carbines. it’d be a shame if we wasted our rations on someone like her, don’t you think?” when harrison didn’t respond, merely gawked at him, caine nonchalantly breathed in another huff of smoke as he carried on, “make it look like an accident. nobody would be any the wiser. if you don’t do it-” his gaze suddenly grew cold as he locked eyes with him. “well. you know what i’d have to do to you.”

“no.” the sudden remark was followed by a silence that rang loudly in harrison’s ears. swallowing hard, he kept his gaze locked onto caine’s. “i can’t kill ellie. she’s my sister; she’s the only family i’ve got.” lowering his gaze down to the table’s surface, he uttered, “i can’t do it.”

the room settled into complete silence, then. harrison could feel caine’s gaze on him, burning into him. the carbines offered safety for the rose siblings- and harrison loved ellie. so much. he couldn’t hurt her, no matter what that meant for him. “very well, then. tom, john.” caine stood up and, as he stood, tom and john were suddenly on harrison like vultures. as much as he struggled against their grip, they had him pinned on the table in no time, gagging him, tying his arms behind his back and tying his legs together.

“no, no, no- please. please. he struggled to talk through the cloth in his mouth, feeling tears spill down his cheeks. no begging seemed to do anything, though, as they began to carry him off. he thrashed about, fought tooth and nail to try and get out of their grip as they dragged him through the dark alleyways. by the time they had left the city in the pale moonlight, harrison had given up on trying to fight his demise. this was it.

they slowed to a stop, and out of the corner of his eyes, harrison could see water’s edge. the lake. a sob passed his lips. “nice knowing you, harrison.” the remark was incredibly cold, and he just barely got to look both of them in the eyes before he was thrown into the water, the cold waves swallowing him. now was the time he struggled, thrashing helplessly to try and stay afloat, but each attempt didn’t help as he sunk further and further into the water’s depths, the light of the moon becoming further and further away. his lungs burned, aching for oxygen. his head was pounding as he thrashed about, squirming helplessly and then-- then he got lucky.

a small bank. just barely could he see the start of a shoreline. and the water had carried him closer towards it, just so he could manage to climb his way up the slope. he wormed his way up the slope and - he gasped for breath as he reached the surface. he still breathed in a bit of water, coughing pathetically as he army-crawled further and further out of the water. although he was still tied, the moment he’d gotten most of his body out of the water, he collapsed on his stomach, gasping for breath. once he was able to breathe, he managed to worm out of his ties, loosened from all of his thrashing. his wrists were rubbed raw, cuts marring the delicate skin where the rope had once been. standing up unsteadily, he walked on shaky legs further away from the lake and to the shade of the nearby trees and forestry.

the moment he got to sit down and process what had happened was the moment his eyes watered yet again, wiping feebly at the tears. he had to save ellie, he had to-- but he knew he couldn’t go back. he’d be dead before he even got to see her. all he could do was wait at the lake, near the carbines’ territory, and pray that ellie would come in search for him.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

thing is, ellie and mick never came. for two weeks he waited outside of carbine territory. two weeks he hoped to see his sister and her boyfriend leaving the territory in search for him. but they never showed up. did they ever even look? harrison knew he shouldn’t have been getting bitter over it, but he’d stayed for as long as he possibly could. he’d have to get going if he wanted to find more food and to get out of harm’s way. and it seemed like mickey and ellie weren't going to be looking for him any time soon… with a frown on his features, he glanced at carbine territory one last time before he turned and left, and along with it, left all hopes of ever seeing his sister again.



Offline elysian.

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Re: [ it's all decided for us - writing dump ]
« Reply #4 on: July 21, 2019, 01:25:18 PM »
foxwell made this bitch
imageyeet
yeet
"cutting ties" | addy | angst inspo
(trigger warnings all around; drug use, death, violence, drug-related death)

loud laughter cut through the paper-thin walls, waking the young teen up. good god, they’d already managed to keep him awake for half of the night; couldn’t they at least keep it down this early in the morning? he looked over at his alarm clock, contemplated staying in his room. if he ignored the two of them, they’d more than likely ignore him. another belt of laughter echoing through the walls, though, had him thinking he couldn’t stay in there for long without going crazy. if his mom was going to be bringing random fucking strangers over every night, she might as well give him a damn warning. or maybe it was his fault for expecting anything from her.

throwing on clothes - a wrinkled t-shirt laying on the ground, jeans that didn’t seem dirty - addy took a deep breath before he stepped out the door. the plan had been to avoid eye contact, not even look at them as they did fuck-knows in the small kitchen area. with a straight face he made a beeline for the door, but he had come so close yet so far because --

“addy! c’mere.”

he slowed to a step, staring at the door - his exit - almost longingly before turning his gaze over towards his mom’s voice. and there she was, some stranger’s arms around her. an easy, lazy smile plastered on her lips. “why are you in such a hurry? got somewhere to go?”
“yeah. out of here.” the guy she was with looked completely unamused. ronnie, on the other hand, seemed relatively unfazed by the remark, simply laughing softly before turning and uttering something to the stranger. something audible enough to know she was making some comment off about his behavior, but also not loud enough for him to know exactly what she had said to the guy. he tried not to sneer at the words that came to mind.

“this is- jim--”

he cringed at the all-too familiar name, trying not to appear as fazed by it as he was as the man corrected with a quick “steve.” shaking her head, his mom - was she high? or was she just that fucking dumb? - straightened before saying softly, “and you’ll be seeing a lot more of steve around here.” and most days, addy could keep his mouth shut. sometimes he contemplated just believing in her false beliefs and her fucking bullshit lies. most days he would simply give a huff of disbelief and be out the door. today, though, wasn’t the day where he had what it took to give ronnie that much.

“that’s what you say about every guy you bring here. seriously, what the fuck, mom?”

he’d been taking a few more steps closer to her, but the other man had been quick to step closer before he’d even had the chance. “shut up, kid.” did every guy who stepped in here think they had some fucking authority just because they could shoot smack and get between some stupid drug addict’s legs? the guy was too close though, way too close for comfort. it set red flags off in the back of addy’s head - but he ignored them. fueled by anger, he stood closer to the guy, in his face.

“make me.”

this stranger must’ve had a shorter fuse than addy, because he had taken the teen’s bait within a moment. it.. hadn’t been what he’d expected. and when a fist collided with his face, stepping back out of both pain and faint surprise, he contemplated if jumping this motherfucker would be worth it. instead he opted for bringing a hand up to his nose, where it hurt the most, and looking at his hand long enough to see blood on his fingers. motherfucker. “get out! get out! nobody, and i mean nobody can--” his mom was pushing the man out, berating him the whole while. he continued to hold a hand over his nose, eyes watering slightly from the pain.

her arm was around his shoulders. “are you okay? here, let me see-” he made eye contact with her for just a moment before turning his gaze away. even as she wordlessly handed him an ice pack, wrapped her arms back around his shoulders as a silent apology, he couldn’t look. he couldn’t look into those bloodshot eyes.

he hadn’t asked for this.


------------------------------------------------------------


“do you actually think about quitting?” it had been asked one quiet night, sitting on the couch, staring out at the shitty view the apartment offered them. she was sitting on the opposite end of the sofa, arms wrapped around her legs, watching the television. once again seeming unfazed by the topic. this wasn’t the first time he had said it; it had lost its shock factor over the years. “you always say you will, but you never do. that shit kills you, you know-”

“i try to. you know i’ve tried-”

“is it that fucking hard?” he looked at her. long and hard. silence. he had no idea. he looked away with a huff, resting the side of his head in the palm of his hand. “you don’t even need to get a job, you know. i’ve got a good job, enough money-” money that she would steal to go and get her own fix, but.. “once you get on your feet, we could-- move somewhere else, too. somewhere with a yard, and a view and not fuckin’- whatever the hell this view is.” a gesture to the window. she laughed a soft, breathy laugh. addy wasn’t finding it as amusing.

“i’ll hold you to that.” 
he hated that the corner of his lips twitched the slightest bit at that. he hated that he’d already done so much for her, more than he should have. he hated that, as she shifted closer, wrapped an arm around his shoulders, rested the side of her head against his own, and murmured a soft, “i’ll quit soon. promise. just give mama time, hun.”... he hated that he believed her again. he didn’t know how much longer he could stand it. being stuck in this cycle that he couldn’t get her out of. he hated what they had become. he had dropped out of high school, lost all of his friends, was stuck working at a job he hated-- and all for his mom, who had done nothing in return but shoot heroin in her veins and beg for his love..

he hadn’t asked for this.

------------------------------------------------------------

god damn it, she had promised. she’d promised that she would stop doing this. last thing he had wanted was to come home to his mom losing her fucking mind, music blaring, talking about dancing on the fucking walls. repainting the fucking walls. he couldn’t help but feel disappointed. not only in her, but in himself for believing that she could actually do it. she’d gone a few days without it. days. i mean, seriously, was it that fucking hard?

he’d holed himself away, unable to understand why she always let him down like that. he’d been laying in his bed, blankets wrapped around him, when the door had slowly opened. his mom shuffled in, arms crossed anxiously across her shoulders. “is today one of your-”

no,” he cut her off abruptly, shooting a glare her way for even thinking about blaming his behavior on his fucking bipolar disorder. a look at her, standing there, looking miserable, made the glare fade, eyes wandering away towards a random spot on the wall. “it’s not that.” a few moments of silence. it looked like they both knew why he was upset, and he thought that he had every reason to be upset. he had tried so hard to help her. he had tried. but a young boy didn’t know how to take care of his mom, let alone when his mom was fighting a battle he couldn’t begin to understand.

“just-- can you believe that for a moment, i actually-” weak huff of air, shake of his head. “for a moment i actually thought you were going to fucking do it.” but she didn’t. and because of that, she really disappointed him. he could hear her sniffling, and he wanted to feel bad. but she had always been so bad to him, so terrible to him. wasn’t now the time that he got to return the favor? “you let me down, mom.”

“i know.” her voice was wobbling, wavering through the tears. she sat down on the edge of the bed, holding a loosely-closed fist up to her mouth as if that would stop the crying.

“i can’t help you anymore. i can’t.”

“i know. i’m sorry.”

------------------------------------------------------------

it had been a long night at the club. aside from having to put up with horny, old men’s bullshit, the night had simply dragged on. longest shift of his fucking life, he decided bitterly, as he wandered down the streets, cigarette between his lips. he took the long way home that night, because he couldn’t fucking stand the idea of being home. it had been getting worse lately. the drinking, the drugs, the strange men, all of it. he had to work extra shifts because she had taken his goddamn savings he’d kept hidden under his mattress. sold it all for drugs that were of no use to addy- and drugs that didn’t fucking pay the rent.

he climbed up the stairway to their apartment number, standing outside to finish his smoke. looking up at the night sky, he took a deep sigh before tossing the cigarette carelessly over the railing. fumbled with his keys, and then pushed the door open. a peek at the living room, and he could just barely see her feet sprawled out on the floor. the rest of her body obstructed from view by the small island between the kitchen and living room. and for once in his life, coming home to a peacefully quiet apartment.. it was enough for him to feel the smallest bit of hope.

“home alone tonight? doesn’t seem like you.” maybe it was for the better. maybe this was one small step towards recovery.

no response.

he opened the fridge, settling for grabbing the carton of orange juice and a glass from the cupboard before heading over to the bar. “at work-” he was pouring the orange juice when his gaze had wandered up to his mom. shit.” it was only moments later that in a moment of shock and panic, the carton had been dropped, spilling over the countertop. the glass falling on its side, rolling off the counter and breaking on the floor, as the young redhead abandoned it to rush into the living room.

now he’d known that this day would come some day. but nothing could prepare a young boy for seeing his mom on the living room floor in this sort of state. falling to his knees, he held her face in his hands- cold. unmoving. vomit around her, on her mouth. death all around her. “no,” he said aloud, to no one in particular. “no, no, no-” chest compressions. chest compressions. he tried it for a while, but the more he looked at her body, looked at her face-- he knew he’d already lost her.

he’d pulled out his phone and called the police. “911- my mom’s not breathing. she’s- she fucking od’ed. help. please, please, i live at--” and he’d been told to stay on the line, but after giving her more information, he’d hung up on the line, cupping his mom’s face.

“don’t do this.” not now. not now. he’d been getting enough money. they could’ve moved out. away from the drugs, away from the slums of this city. instead, though, it was like he was a kid all over again, wanting his mom to wrap her arms around his shoulder and tell him everything would be better.

he hated that she could be so careless. he hated that she could be so cruel and uncaring towards him when she was high. hated that he was crying over someone who had done this to themselves. why did she get to treat him like shit and then leave this world, and still make him love her so goddamn much?

and, as he laid down beside her, rested the side of his head on her chest and hugged himself, most of all…

he hated that he felt relief.

he hadn't asked for this.
« Last Edit: July 21, 2019, 11:46:22 PM by elysian. »