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Offline MALACHI.

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« on: April 13, 2019, 02:26:07 AM »

MALACHI ALLEN ( n )

i . what's the matter — afraid of temptation ?
« Last Edit: Yesterday at 02:24:39 AM by MALACHI. »
WHAT A DRAG ; BEAUTIFUL AND SAD             A GRAVEYARD ON THE SUN .

FUCKING UP  ,  YOU JUST

                                        SELF-DESTRUCT , ABANDONED AND UNDONE .

Offline MALACHI.

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« Reply #1 on: June 06, 2019, 04:06:35 PM »
« Last Edit: June 13, 2019, 04:50:59 PM by MALACHI. »
WHAT A DRAG ; BEAUTIFUL AND SAD             A GRAVEYARD ON THE SUN .

FUCKING UP  ,  YOU JUST

                                        SELF-DESTRUCT , ABANDONED AND UNDONE .

Offline MALACHI.

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« Reply #2 on: June 07, 2019, 06:56:52 AM »
SHE SAID , "  CAREFUL , OR YOU'LL LOSE IT .  "
&. ❝ malachi ❞ |  disapproves of unauthorized nicknames given to her by strangers , though for the ones that are , she endearingly accepts " mal " . however , the rather creative ones consist of " mophead " , " kitten " , " pup " , " junkie " , " kiddo " , " trash girl " , " demon " , " devil " , " gremlin " , " shithead " , and " skinny ankles " | malachi is biologically female | she personally identifies , however , as genderqueer , or as she prefers to call herself , a " gender non-conforming ladyboy " . goes predominantly by feminine pronouns [ she / hers ] , though occasionally refers to herself using masculine titles .
&. 19 years old . | 2nd of november ; scorpio .
&. member of bluestem prairie .


BUT GIRL , "  I'M ONLY HUMAN  . "
&.  [ 5'6" & 117 pounds  ; physical health : 95% ]  [ reference one , reference two ]
&. standing roughly around the height of 5'6 " , rather average , with a lean build leaning more masculine than feminine , and weighing around 53kg , one could surely say malachi doesn't fall anywhere short of ethereal ; dreamy-eyed , the constellations held against dark pupils are colored a magnificent shade of beryl , accompanied by rings of blue and gold . she has dark brown hair , a wild , untamed mess of natural curls with a personality of their own , though full and lucious , cut fairly short , reaching the base of her neck . located near the crease of her right arm is a small stick-n-poke tattoo that writes out the name " mia " . the significance of such , is in question , but claimed to be minor . both of her ears are pierced , though she usually only sports one earring favoring the left ear . around her neck , as commonly observed , she sports a silver chain , and on the ring finger of her right hand , she wears a silver ring , never to be removed . the signficance of that ring is currently unknown .

AND I KNOW THERE'S A BLADE"  WHERE YOUR HEART IS . "
&.  Difficulty [ PHYSICAL : 9/10 ] ﹠ [ PSYCHOLOGICAL : 4/10 ] | WITH FIREARMS [ average ] | WITH MELEE WEAPONS [ medium ] | WITH HAND-TO-HAND [ medium ]
[ STRENGTH: 70% | INTELLIGENCE: 90% | STAMINA: 60% | ENDURANCE: 90% | AGILITY: 70% | DEXTERITY: 90% | REACTION-TIME: 80% | CHARISMA: 80% ]
&. Attack in bold #9e8886 | @MALACHI. | PM for any major plots .
&. Friendly or nonviolent actions may be powerplayed .

AND YOU KNOW HOW TO USE IT"  AND YOU CAN TAKE MY FLESH  "
&. [ 5 ] weapons | [ 0 ] armor pieces | [ 3 ] consumables | [ 1 ] aid items | [ 0 ] misc .
↳ ...

GIRL , BUT BABY ,"  DON'T ABUSE IT .  "
&. unidentified x unidentified | family notes .
↳ [ 00 ] CRUSH | [ 00 ] "POTENTIAL CRUSHES" | ½ of MALACHI ﹠ NAME ; " SHIP NAME "
&. homoromantic , homosexual ; monogamous | a coping mechanism formed and used an emotional outlet — malachi's response to any emotional stimulation , particularly discomfort , though also encompasses any feelings of anger , sadness , boredom , or joy ; is sex — these sexual pursuits are also a reflection of malachi's lack of ,  but desire for a true intimate connection .  however , unwilling to surrender herself emotionally to an individual out of fear and distrust of their intentions , she figures such acts will allow her to maintain an intimate  distance without the formation of emotional attachment which , ultimately , allows her to remain in control of , and preserve her own emotional wellbeing while using those particular individuals she sleeps with as a means to fill that space . as for those people , malachi doesn't necessarily view them as a ' whole ' person with separate thoughts and feelings of their own ,  but more as a point to what emotional requirement can they fulfill in order for her to feel satisfied . however , if she feels as if the other party if forming a dependency on her , she will leave and seek out other people . though , to put it all simply , malachi is in love with the idea of being in love , but she will not commit to it , and don't expect her to . she will use you and leave you for as long as you allow her to .
« Last Edit: June 13, 2019, 04:50:39 PM by MALACHI. »
WHAT A DRAG ; BEAUTIFUL AND SAD             A GRAVEYARD ON THE SUN .

FUCKING UP  ,  YOU JUST

                                        SELF-DESTRUCT , ABANDONED AND UNDONE .

Offline MALACHI.

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« Reply #3 on: June 07, 2019, 09:04:41 AM »
*     MALACHI ALLEN      /        desired , but never loved  .

known as "  malachi  " , a nineteen year old scorpio born on the second day of the month of november . originally hailing from the once glorified city of brooklyn , new york , she now resides at bluestem prairie . standing roughly around the height of 5'6 " , rather average , with a lean build leaning more masculine than feminine , and weighing around 53kg , one could surely say malachi doesn't fall anywhere short of ethereal ; dreamy-eyed , the constellations held against dark pupils are colored a magnificent shade of beryl , accompanied by rings of blue and gold . she has dark brown hair , a wild , untamed mess of natural curls with a personality of their own , though full and lucious , cut fairly short , reaching the base of her neck . located near the crease of her arm is a small stick-n-poke tattoo that writes out the name " mia " . the significance of such , is in question , but claimed to be minor . both of her ears are pierced , though she usually only sports one earring favoring the left ear . around her neck , as commonly observed , she sports a silver chain , and on the ring finger of her right hand , she wears a silver ring , never to be removed . the signficance of that ring is currently unknown .
*           /          reference one , reference two , reference three , reference four .       



strength ( 7/10 ) , willpower ( 10/10 ) , dexterity ( 9/10 ) , intelligence ( 9/10 ) , wisdom ( 4/10 ) , charisma ( 8/10 ) , agility ( 7/10 ) , stamina ( 6/10 ) , endurance ( 9/10 ) , teamwork ( 2/10 ) , stealth ( 7/10 ) , reaction time ( 8/10 ) , humor ( 10/10 ) , fortitude ( 9/10 ) , faith ( 2/10 ) , melee combat ( 8/10 ) , armed combat ( 6/10 ) , leadership ( 2/10 )
« Last Edit: June 13, 2019, 04:51:59 PM by MALACHI. »
WHAT A DRAG ; BEAUTIFUL AND SAD             A GRAVEYARD ON THE SUN .

FUCKING UP  ,  YOU JUST

                                        SELF-DESTRUCT , ABANDONED AND UNDONE .

Offline MALACHI.

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« Reply #4 on: June 07, 2019, 10:46:05 AM »
malachi is a biblical name borne by one of the twelve minor prophets in the old testament . the name is hebrew in origin from “ mal'akhi ” meaning , ‘ my messenger ’  , or ' my angel ' , which is fitting since malachi foretold the coming of god ( i.e. , through jesus christ ) . he lived in the 5th century b.c. and  repeatedly emphasized the upcoming “ day of the lord ” whereby the peoples’ sin and unfaithfulness will be punished .

the name allen is a celtic baby name . in celtic , the meaning of the name allen is " harmony " , " stone " , or " noble " ; also " fair  , handsome "  .



*    name inspiration and symbolism : her given name " malachi " and its meaning serves as contradiction to her image as a malevolent being , reinforced by her foster parent's indoctrination of such idea . the titles " child from hell " , " devil's incarnate " , " demon " , and " devil " , commonly bestowed upon her head , though she's eventually come to accept and exploit . it is also in reference to her resentment for christ and religion despite of her own messiah complex .

as for her last name , " allen " , meaning " harmony " ; represents the contradiction between the peace and idealistic passions she wishes to incite , though due to her tendency to get so caught up within that goal , she unintentionally causes more harm than she does help which brings upon dissonance , both physical and mental .
« Last Edit: Yesterday at 12:42:39 AM by MALACHI. »
WHAT A DRAG ; BEAUTIFUL AND SAD             A GRAVEYARD ON THE SUN .

FUCKING UP  ,  YOU JUST

                                        SELF-DESTRUCT , ABANDONED AND UNDONE .

Offline MALACHI.

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« Reply #5 on: June 07, 2019, 10:46:30 AM »
malachi is the campaigner ( enfp-t ) myers-briggs personality type , scoring 74% extraverted to 26% introverted ; 71% intuitive to 29% observant ; 49% thinking to 51% feeling ; 18% judging to 82% prospecting ; and 1% assertive to 99% turbulent ; her alignment , chaotic good , leaning 4% towards law , 10% towards neutral , and 15% towards chaos with a melancholic temperament . her tropes consist of the byronic hero , dark messiah , the atoner , knight in sour armor , glory seeker , martyr without a cause , the cynic , jerk with a heart of gold , aloof ally , the trickster , rebellious spirit , consummate liar , jack of all trades , opportunistic bastard , deadpan snarker , brilliant , but lazy , holier than thou , hair-trigger temper , pay evil unto evil , brutal honesty , gut feeling , dismotivation , being good sucks , hero with an f in good , and attention seeker .



characteristics : ardent , conscientious , fervid , perspicacious , adroit , affable , alluring , astute , compassionate , resilient , nihilistic , iconoclastic , irreverent , apathetic , casuistic , choleric , complacent , fickle , imprudent , perverse , persumptious , recalcitrant , tactless , volatile , disputatious , self-destructive , mellow , non-comittal , candid , insouciant , aloof , enigmatic , opinionated , hedonistic , melancholic .
« Last Edit: June 14, 2019, 09:48:45 PM by MALACHI. »
WHAT A DRAG ; BEAUTIFUL AND SAD             A GRAVEYARD ON THE SUN .

FUCKING UP  ,  YOU JUST

                                        SELF-DESTRUCT , ABANDONED AND UNDONE .

Offline MALACHI.

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« Reply #6 on: June 08, 2019, 05:52:14 PM »
ALLURING ; ENIGMATIC
here .



PERVERSE ; FLIRTATIOUS
her sexuality is embedded deep within her personality as it is one of , if not her main , expressor . suggestive , vulgar , and incredibly lewd , it may be more of an understatement to say malachi has her head buried deep within the gutter . viewing herself as quite the casanova with a habit of breaking hearts , it's not exactly a stretch when those who get tangled within her web of casual indulgence , tell you malachi is a goddamned fox ; naturally suave , it comes easy . with a tongue so sweet and words crafted like honey , man , she really knows how to weasel her way under someone's skin . she'll tell you everything you wish to hear and then some . playfully and painfully teasing in all the best and worst ways possible , it seems like its her sworn duty to get a rise out just about anyone she comes into contact with . considerably the spiritual embodiment of a fifteen-year-old boy , malachi would even admit , her level of humor couldn't be any more childish as she's never above passing a slick comment here and there in order raise a few brows or treading boundaries to flaunt her proclaimed finesse in hopes of impressing those she idolizes . with that being said , malachi is a relatively simple-minded person who is very easily pleased , and who's buttons are very , very easy to press , that is , if you're one of those willing to entertain her antics . getting her wrapped her around your finger isn't a hard task to do , and she's often susceptible to manipulation due to her tendency to often value lust over love . she's unabashedly bold in her exclamation for topics more sensous , stating her intents upfront , never the one to sugar coat just what she's looking for . however , malachi tries her hardest to keep her eccentricity within the limits of good-natured fun and won't push those subjected to her provocative humor to limits they're uncomfortable with when detecting their discomfort or made aware of such ; immediately apologizing and backing off .



FERVID ; PERSONABLE
here .



RECKLESS ; IMPRUDENT
here .



NONCOMMITAL ; PASSIVE
here .



APPREHENSIVE ; FICKLE
here .



ICONOCLASTIC ; NIHILISTIC
heaven and hell , god and satan — though raised under strict christian principles , stories of these fictitional beings have never been something she's much believed in . call her a heretic . in fact , malachi very , very strongly rejects the idea of religion . the word of god , in specific . quite frankly , there is a deep , festered hatred for the deity known as " christ " . and while she doesn't think him to be real — nothing more than a faux symbol of morality and righteousness gifted to those too weak to take accountability for the wrongs committed and accept the reality that everyone ends up in a coffin ; so they get down and their hands and knees to kiss the boots of a man who promises " salvation " in exchange for blind servitude for the rest of their lives . it's disgusting — repulsive . living as a sheep ? the thought leaves a bitter taste in her mouth . jesus wasn't a good guy . nah . he never was . but he is , however , a liar . if he so happened to be the " kind " , " compassionate " , " merciful savior " , then just what was his reasoning for sending the world into collapse ? for tearing lives apart ? for stealing futures ? her own future ? despite the countless pleas for help , he remained negligent , supine — silent . an enabler of unnecessary suffering . malachi cannot forgive him for such a crime .

not to mention , the bible's full of contradictions . it advocates more hate and destruction than it preaches for love and peace , and it all reflects through the parading of his cult . she wants nothing to do with it — nothing to do with an ideology that can't even agree with itself . malachi hates that it's not through genuine faith that these particular people follow him . they don't commit to the things that they do out of the true good of their heart . they only perform under the threat of eternal damnation . that's not real faith . it will never be real faith ; and god is a lying , cheating , dispicable scumbag who preys on and exploits the insecurities of simple men . and you know , it really makes you think , between he and satan , just who is the true evil ? she won't fall victim .



SANCTIMONIOUS ; RIGHTEOUS
however , malachi's also quite the hypocrite . while she's confident in her proclaimed disdain for christ and the cross , and believes her reasonings to be an unrivaled truth , in a way , her own views are greatly derived from his described talents that she strives to imitate . while outwardly appearing entirely detached from all moral values , malachi is someone who views herself as a " godlike " figure who is capable of committing no error — should commit no error , and who's duty is to correct right from wrong — to punish all those who have inflicted harm upon her and those she value . possessing what one could call a " dark messiah " complex , malachi very much considers herself as an " avenger " , often visualizing and obsessing over imagined scenarios where she is narrated as the " chosen martyr " , delivering punishment of what she accepts as " fair retribution " while shouldering the sins of all of those around her . though rejecting the employment of authority by those other than herself , malachi sets herself to a very high moral standard , and views anything that seems to challenge her ideas , as malicious or evil-intended . she's a protector , unwavering in the people she wishes to defend ; under shared empathy and the lack of judgement towards those who fit under the " underdog " profile or particularly those unable to defend themselves , though she will go to extremes , without regard for any opposing forces , to rid humanity of what she believes to be evil . however this behavior is threaded within a defining flaw of malachi's : her self-worth and absence of self-image . with a subconscious need to prove her morality to others under the core belief that there is no being capable of committing worse evil than she herself , targetting immoral and malicious figures provides her with a sense of purpose that she's been missing ; a method of atonement . to be the person to accept hurt rather than inflict it upon those who are innocent , is noble — a cause she's willing to die for . . even if the " necessary sacrifice " is an imagined one .



MASOCHISTIC ; SELF-DESTRUCTIVE
tied within these particular thoughts , lie malachi's view on existence , and you begin to wonder if it's the only thing that ever occupies her mind . oddly obsessed with the idea of death , suicide , and all things macabre , to her , it's a romantic tragedy — the only way she'd wish to go out . the only way malachi is dead-set on going out . and while malachi may appear to be a committed hedonist , seeking the finer luxuries in life that ensure her own personal happiness : sex , drugs , and music ; her outlook on mortality and spirituality rest upon a much , much darker plane . malachi romanticizes death , it's no secret — utterly glorifies it . it's all she ever talks about , it seems ; known to ramble on about those particular scenarios she creates within her head that places both her and death at the epicenter . and what's more unsettling , is that malachi tends to do so casually . all out of humor , even — like it's a simple off-hand comment to a friend , seemingly unfazed by the grim setting . she doesn't think much of it . she doesn't care to think much of it . so on this topic , malachi unfortunately deals with a lot of self-harm issues , going on to develop an emotional addiction to pain . she likes to feel it , in a way — has to feel it in order to feel real . it serves as an anchor . the physical reminder that she is in fact still human . though , from an outsider's standpoint , you could say , her behavior may exhibit extreme at times , but ultimately , you won't think much of it because , really , she's still just a kid . for kids , of course , things like that is normal . recklessness is normal ; you think the world can't touch you , and so-on . it's what teenagers do because they're teenagers . however , there is a fine threshold between being young , a bit dumb , and irresponsible , and being downright neglectful of both your wellbeing and those around you , and that's exactly the line malachi has breached .

with everything she does , in time , you'll be able to discern what is normal and what is not — by the way she so carelessly throws herself into these petty brawls , spitting the blood from her mouth with a lopsided grin as if she enjoys the feeling of knuckles against her cheeks , and turning right back around to do it again all in the same day — the way she traces her fingers along the stitches that line each split knuckle , only for her to tear them out because theyre " irritating " ; the way she finds herself carefully pressing into each bruise with the blade of a knife in order to see " how much it can take before it breaks " out of the name of " curiosity " . it's the way she picks at those stitches until they bleed just because of " the urge " ; the way she never allows herself to rest because she's already back with another injury . it's a cycle she can't seem to break — it's a cycle she's not sure she can break as it does provide emotional release . especially so when she's feeling rather impulsive . of course , these tendencies are also rooted in malachi's childhood spent with agnes . pain is something she grew up with . grown accustomed to . consider it an old friend — learning to adapt was something malachi had to do earlier than any child should have . and while malachi has , over the years , developed a tolerance for beatings , whether it be physical or verbal , it's still something she struggles heavily with . this time , it's in the way she gets so upset — so damn angry at just the drop of a dime ; at the smallest thing — at herself ; that she will kick , and kick , and kick herself down and refuse to allow herself back up . it's in the way once her fuse is lit , it's near impossible to extinguish it . it's the way fists connect with concrete wall , skin tearing ; over and over , and over , and over , while she continues to ignore the red that seeps between the spaces of her fingers and stains the ground . it's the way those punches pick up in intensity in an attempt to find release , only to receive nothing but the same feeling of absolute loathing . it's in the way she kicks and smashes ; an animalistic urge to destroy everything in her path ; until she burns out . it's in the way malachi absolutely feels she has to hurt herself in the worst ways possible — for every mistake and error — for nothing at all ; she has to punish herself for it .

and going on to address other influences that affect her ideals ; music , or what music used to be , is one of them ; and the domestic dreams of her becoming a rockstar once the apocalypse has ceased is definitely one of the biggest points . throughout her studies of past legends in the entertainment scene , malachi has come to idolize a specific group of people : the 27's club . viewing their lives of fame and glory leading up to their deaths to be noble , she wishes to obtain the same riches they once posessed ; also believing in the " tortured artist " trope , and considering it crucial to her own process of going about life and documenting her experiences . it inspires . she can relate . all great art derives from some source of pain , and in a way , she visualizes her own death to be that art . frequently alluding to , and explicitly describing all the ways she'd gore herself for eventually and prematurely taking her own life ; malachi wants her death to reflect the turbulence of all that she feels inside . it's painful . it's ugly . it hurts . but , she also thinks it to be beautiful . beautiful , sad , and true . posthumous living . it's beautiful . she doesn't want to be forgotten . and if anyone had to remember her for anything , it'd be just that . maybe she'd be loved then . people always seem to care a little bit more when you're buried six feet under than they do when you're alive .



DICHOTOMOUS THINKER
a defense coping mechanism used to avoid getting hurt and make sense of the world around her ; a way malachi can view people , events , and even herself on a " black and white " spectrum or " all or nothing " terms , she " splits " , meaning malachi has difficulty holding opposing thoughts , beliefs , or feelings ; she cannot weigh the positive or negative attributes of a person or event , or recognize that those good and bad attributes can be true simultaneously . to her , it’s only “ good “ or “ bad “ , “ always “ or “ never “ and she will typically frame individuals or events on terms where there is no middle ground for discussion or argument . for example : to malachi , people are either " perfect " or " angels " , or " evil " or " liars " . or , she may say " i love you " , and then turn around and say " i hate you , stay away from me ! " in the same breath . or , when a situation goes wrong , malachi will often feel " cheated " or " screwed-over " or that " her life's completely fallen apart " , which often leads others to believe that she is overdramatic as her views are rapidly changing .



VISIONARY ; IDEALISTIC
a true visionary , one could say ; malachi always seems to have her head lost in the clouds . quite the prolific thinker , though ironic due to her extreme impulsivity that seems to spoil such attributes , she probably does more thinking than anyone you'd know — more thinking than one ever should ; absorbing and psychoanalyzing each and every thought , however , unsure if it's a trait of positive or negative implications . so , with this , it's pretty apparent that malachi's a rather spacey individual — constantly zoned out and unable to keep focused for long . it's not hard to tell when her attention's centered elsewhere ; there's always a certain look that adorns her face . she doesn't tend to make much effort to hide it , either . you'll know . and though while she may seem too far astray in her over-excessive thinking , there is also a positive to having a brain with no off-button to switch . clever than a damn fox , malachi is one hell of a force when it comes to pulling tricks from her sleeves ; crafty with each idea concieved . if there's not a way , she'll create one . however , entirely comitting to some of these ideas isn't something malachi can quite do ; constantly flip-flopping , sifting , and shifting back and forth between the layers of these thoughts . but , due to such , she is also able to embrace a very large visual pattern of creative thoughts , and her level of intuition is , quite frankly , insane , and she'd much rather prefer to use that skill as opposed to normal logical means , testing theories through her own vivid imagery and refusing to conform to any limitations that time , resources , and space may bring . she also uses these fantasies to separate herself from anyone or anything that exhibits discomfort , too much challenge , or too much structure in her life .



TEMPERAMENTAL ; VOLATILE
here .



DEPENDENT ; OBSESSIVE
however , also in regards to her sexuality being embedded a great deal within malachi's defining behavior , it isn't just a casual interest she likes to express , but is very heavily rooted in a fundamental base of trauma and diminished self-worth . while it's known there's a paradox that exists within malachi's behaviors , in specific , a battle between her senses of displayed apathy and overwhelming internalized empathy , addressing in general , malachi's views on people are very much materialistic and superficial , categorizing those of interest mainly on perceived sexual usefulness ( those tending to be the " caregiver " types in which she gravitates towards ) ; considering these particular people as " objects " , " tools " , or " points " towards a goal , while often ignoring the actual humanity of said person — all feelings , wants , or needs typically left neglected or downplayed as a result of malachi's seemingly selfish persuit of fulfillment . while it's an obvious problematic way of thinking , back to methods of coping and in defense , that is exactly what occurs here . in reality , it's malachi herself who's placing her worth in the exhibition of sexual attractiveness and availability as she only feels as if she's only useful when being used . most importantly , it's a skewed aspect of power that reveals itself through her masochistic tendencies as malachi does have a very bad habit of deliberately seeking out harmful , abusive , toxic relationships and individuals , most specifically , and most often , those who emulate her own past abuser(s) . rooted in her innate , yet never fulfilled desire to please agnes who gained her own pleasure , happiness , and amusement out of the abuse inflicted upon malachi , this is what she's looking to do in these other relationships . the idea of being used , physically harmed , mistreated , or degraded is most desirable because she feels as if then , she's been given a purpose . doesn't matter if she's the one who receives punishment because it's also something she believes is deserved and ought to settle for regardless . if they acquire pleasure from it , then that ought to mean she's doing something right . . right ?

and despite being someone who struggles so intensely with power control and needing to be the person in possession of it , it's these particular relationships malachi has no problem surrendering to . for one : her " truth " behind her existence has essentially been affirmed . and while validation and praise is sought for in return , malachi doesn't put much faith into the idea it'd be received , and settles for it anyway — seemingly contently . and two : once again , paired with her core belief that she is inherently bad , and that outside of sexual settings , she lacks usefulness and desirability ; life of instability , turbulence , and sacrifice is familiar — an emotional safety net as anything that differs , particularly stable and healthy relationships are threatening and dangerous , and something to be avoided .

despite often being chaotic and unable to maintain , relationships mean absolutely everything to malachi , though she's very emotionally guarded as she only allows herself to genuinely care for very few people . however , she is quite sensitive to the way others treat and view her — malachi takes just about everything personal , and she tends to put out more than those put in . idealizing potential caregivers or lovers upon first or second meeting , she often tends to " fall in love " with strangers , sharing even the most intimate details of her personal life early in the relationship ; though , her feelings aren't necessarily genuine , but more of a projection of a connection she yearns for , but has always lacked . however , those ' feelings ' are also short-lived and ultimately abandoned — her feelings for another individual rapidly shifting from extreme idealization , love , and appreciation to extreme devaluzation , hatred , and demonization over small occurrences ; feeling as if that person " does not care enough " , " does not give enough " , or " is not there enough "  .



EMPATHIC ; COMPASSIONATE
here .



LOYAL ; DEVOTED
here .


« Last Edit: Yesterday at 03:24:48 AM by MALACHI. »
WHAT A DRAG ; BEAUTIFUL AND SAD             A GRAVEYARD ON THE SUN .

FUCKING UP  ,  YOU JUST

                                        SELF-DESTRUCT , ABANDONED AND UNDONE .

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« Reply #7 on: June 08, 2019, 05:52:49 PM »
reserved space for appearance .
« Last Edit: Yesterday at 12:17:58 AM by MALACHI. »
WHAT A DRAG ; BEAUTIFUL AND SAD             A GRAVEYARD ON THE SUN .

FUCKING UP  ,  YOU JUST

                                        SELF-DESTRUCT , ABANDONED AND UNDONE .

Offline MALACHI.

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« Reply #8 on: June 12, 2019, 03:29:29 PM »
reserved space for history .
« Last Edit: Yesterday at 12:17:51 AM by MALACHI. »
WHAT A DRAG ; BEAUTIFUL AND SAD             A GRAVEYARD ON THE SUN .

FUCKING UP  ,  YOU JUST

                                        SELF-DESTRUCT , ABANDONED AND UNDONE .

Offline MALACHI.

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« Reply #9 on: Yesterday at 12:17:40 AM »
reserved space for important connections .
WHAT A DRAG ; BEAUTIFUL AND SAD             A GRAVEYARD ON THE SUN .

FUCKING UP  ,  YOU JUST

                                        SELF-DESTRUCT , ABANDONED AND UNDONE .

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« Reply #10 on: Yesterday at 12:19:10 AM »
reserved space for inventory .
WHAT A DRAG ; BEAUTIFUL AND SAD             A GRAVEYARD ON THE SUN .

FUCKING UP  ,  YOU JUST

                                        SELF-DESTRUCT , ABANDONED AND UNDONE .