Author Topic: ❝ REMEMBER ME┊PRIVATE, SCULLY. ❞  (Read 226 times)

Offline hunnyween

  • Posts: 12354
  • prev. demaury
    • View Profile
❝ REMEMBER ME┊PRIVATE, SCULLY. ❞
« on: June 04, 2019, 10:56:53 PM »
a v e r y  r a d c l i f f e.
tw slight suicide ish mention
it was nights like these that avery really fell hard for the other boy. to see his smile, so big and toothy and genuine, and knowing that he was the reason for that joy filled his heart with love. his heart was so full of theo that he could barely call it his own anymore. this dependence on his boyfriend that developed was most definitely not the healthiest, but avery didn't care. if anything, the dependency was mutual. theo relied heavily on avery and avery relied heavily on theo. without theodore, he was sure he'd be dead by now. he would have drowned in his thoughts, unable to come out of the depressed state he was in when he met theo, and could have quite possibly taken his life. this wasn't an over exaggeration, no - avery radcliffe needed theodore dreamer because his life depended on him. his mom said it herself; avery had found the light in his life when theo came into the story.

and on this particularly starry night in the city of love - paris, france - avery felt at peace with the world. the two were sat atop that roof, sipping wine from stemless wine glasses, and staring out at the beautifully lit city ahead of them. to the side of avery was a bag with one last croissant, still fresh from that afternoon. he reached inside the bag to pull it out and set his wine glass aside so he could split it in half. ❝ à nous, mon mec. je t'aime, ❞ the boy hummed to his lover, tapping their halves of the pastry together and taking a bite followed by a swig of wine. avery looked back to the city, his eyes spotting the iconic eiffel tower, and let out a content sigh through his nose.

you think about the future, yes? ❞ he says after a few minutes had passed since his little speech, ❝ i know we have talked about it before - a lot actually - but.. what about alone? ❞ avery's eyes never leave the eiffel tower and its brilliant lights shining on everything around it. he pulls a pack of marlboro cigarettes - which he swore he was going to quit soon - and places it between his teeth. pulling the lighter out he cups a hand around the flame as he flicks it on, lighting the end of it. he takes a drag from the cigarette and turns his head up to the sky, away from theo, and blows. ❝ because i always wonder... i wonder about our future. i wonder about the futures of all the different versions of ourselves.. you know, like the different universes? what are their lives like? are you the french one? are you taller? are you a movie star, or something? ❞ he feels stupid saying it out loud, but he knows theo can maybe try to relate. they were practically the same person, save for a few habits and avery having more dark humor.

am i... normal? ❞ the question came out slow and hesitant. he was treading on eggshells when it came to talking about this stuff. avery didn't like talking about it, knowing that talking about it only made it even more of a reality, but they needed to. the topic was uncomfortable, yes, but it was important. he couldn't drop the "i'm bipolar" bomb and not have a full talk about it with him.

&& @scully
tell me you love me, but you treat me like i'm never there. ★
[ aka bee / sixteen / discord: hunny#1416 / any pronouns. ]


Offline scully

  • i really hope it hurts like hell
  • Posts: 4294
    • View Profile
Re: ❝ REMEMBER ME┊PRIVATE, SCULLY. ❞
« Reply #1 on: June 04, 2019, 11:47:17 PM »
TRACK!!!AHH
・゚✧ and that's because i wanna be your favorite boy, i wanna be the one that makes your day, the one you think about as you lie awake. i can't wait to be your number one, i'll be your biggest fan and you'll be mine, but i still wanna break your heart and make you cry.

Offline scully

  • i really hope it hurts like hell
  • Posts: 4294
    • View Profile
Re: ❝ REMEMBER ME┊PRIVATE, SCULLY. ❞
« Reply #2 on: June 06, 2019, 01:06:04 AM »
THEODORE DREAMER
✯ — oh, baby, i'll remember you
space
to say avery has changed theo's life would be an understatement; the older boy started his life. sure, obviously theodore had a few years on this earth prior to meeting him, but it lacked any sort of.. value, he had been simply just drifting through the universe, merely surviving ( and that could even be a gracious word for it ). unrelenting torment by three older brothers who embodied their father's idea of perfect sons, then little theo; the youngest, the smallest by a landslide, and only gay one, he never stood a chance. then, like from some cheesy romance movie, some gorgeous stranger beat up his brother in the middle of the school yard and theo couldn't let him just slip away with that. a sudden burst of confidence and there was the start; the first day of his life.

now, after countless firsts and french lessons, there they are, sat atop a building in paris, france, watching the night sky with fresh croissants and wine. the lights reflect in his big, doe-like ice blue eyes as he stares in awe, mouth just slightly agape. it feels too good to be true, theo doesn't believe it's possible to feel this good, to feel this content and secure, this loved, he shakes his head for a quick moment, closing his eyes, half expecting to wake up from all of this when he opens his eyes again, but he's still there and with a quick glance back to avery, everything is right. eyes flutter down to the half of a croissant that's being offered to him and he takes it with a little smile, the flakey pastry already making a bit of a mess in his lap while avery toasts the two halves. he glances up at avery, an almost trace like look when he's around the love of his life, a silent plea for affection to soothe a need that is never truly quenched when it comes to his lover. "moi aussi." theo answers in his ever-improving french; he desperately wants to be fluent because he knows how much it means to his boyfriend, but he so often gets overwhelmed when trying to learn, he's unbelievably frustrated with himself that he isn't already better than he is.

theodore rests against his rock, gently matting his fluffy and soft hair as he listens to the question. while about to answer, avery runs with his ideas and some make theo giggle a little bit, but he gets it. "i always think about it," he starts searching for avery's hand, his lifeline, "you're my whole future, we're happy and in france and you get to do art and we have little ones and," theo has to stop and take a breath because he's getting so into it, he's not breathing and just has a huge grin on his face. alternate universes are something he believes in and considers often, but doesn't like it because it makes his head hurt and scares him in someways. "i-i do sometimes, think about all the other versions of us," he's getting quieter, looking down to his hands which fiddle around in his lap, "b-but, i like ours better... because.. for every infinite version, there's as many where w-we don't work out o-or we, or we never meet," his words begin to get more and more jumbled and his stutter makes an appearance while he's getting more auibly distressed just by the thought of them not being together. tears well in his eyes a bit and he closes them quickly, trying not to have avery notice while he wipes them away and take in a breath to regain his composure, "i just don't like to usually." he stops his rambling, but he's so quiet.

the last idea doesn't sit well with theo, it makes his eyebrows furrow together and him pull away slightly and look up at avery. alright, he's gotta admit that he's incredibly attractive when he's smoking, but the habit is so vile that theo wishes he would stop. however, he isn't too worried about that in this moment, he's concerned with what was said. a little laugh gets out of him, a nervous one, he always laughs when he's nervous and he hates it. "w-what, what do you mean? you're... you're normal, avery," theo insists, "why.. why would-why would you-why would you say that?"
space
#psychosocial.
・゚✧ and that's because i wanna be your favorite boy, i wanna be the one that makes your day, the one you think about as you lie awake. i can't wait to be your number one, i'll be your biggest fan and you'll be mine, but i still wanna break your heart and make you cry.

Offline hunnyween

  • Posts: 12354
  • prev. demaury
    • View Profile
Re: ❝ REMEMBER ME┊PRIVATE, SCULLY. ❞
« Reply #3 on: June 07, 2019, 11:17:12 AM »
a v e r y  r a d c l i f f e.
avery listened intently to him, wanting to take in his every word. he always listened when theo spoke, not wanting to miss a single word and for theo to know he cared about him. he knew the younger boy had been so devoid of that kindness growing up and he wanted nothing more than to fix that. from day one he was always trying to protect that smile and that laugh, to keep it as bright as ever so his light would never flicker and go out.

he furrows his eyebrows when he explains the fact that in those universes they aren't together, and takes another puff from his cigarette. he doesn't have time to ask anymore when theo starts to stutter, insisting that avery is normal. but he isn't and he's aware of this - or, it's what he tells himself. ❝ i'm not normal, theo, ❞ avery says simply, laying down on the roof and staring up at the stars with a blank expression. the cigarette is placed back between his lips and the end of it glows a soft orange, lighting up the ends of his finger tips. ❝ you know it, i know it, mom knows it. ❞ he can't bring himself to look at the love of his life and see how distressed he may look. he doesn't mean to hurt him like that, it's actually what he hates doing the most. he's supposed to protect theodore; not the opposite.

i go from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows so fast.. that's not normal. who do you know, that isn't like me, that can do that? and it's not like i can control it. and when i'm at my lowest point, you always end up hurt. ❞ he's rambling now, in such a monotonous voice that it's like he isn't even bothered by the fact he's degrading and putting himself down like this. it's as if he's been doing this to himself his whole life and he had become numb to it. ❝ i want to be normal - like you and alistair and tally. i want to be a functioning adult. it doesn't help that i'm stupid- ❞ he stops abruptly with the knowledge that if he goes on anymore it could make theo even more upset than he already was. ❝ i'm really sorry. teddy.
tell me you love me, but you treat me like i'm never there. ★
[ aka bee / sixteen / discord: hunny#1416 / any pronouns. ]


Offline scully

  • i really hope it hurts like hell
  • Posts: 4294
    • View Profile
Re: ❝ REMEMBER ME┊PRIVATE, SCULLY. ❞
« Reply #4 on: July 11, 2019, 01:18:46 AM »
THEODORE DREAMER
✯ — oh, baby, i'll remember you
space
his face continues to get more distressed as avery goes on. he hates times like this, hearing his boyfriend tear himself down like that. he pouts to himself for a moment before glancing over his shoulder at avery. he takes in a quiet breath and leans back to lay down too, looking up at the sky. “you don’t have to apologize to me,” theo mumbles, slowly glances over at him and chewing on the inside of his cheek. “but i’m not functioning or normal either,” he’s given up on trying to tell avery that he is normal. ”and you’re not stupid, i’ve never thought that, even for a moment,” theo swallows and closes his eyes, “i can’t do things on my own, i don’t eat right, i don’t get much sleep,”
he closes his eyes for a moment, knowing how all of that affects avery as well, the worry and everything else that his flaws bring. a lump has formed in his throat, making it hard for theo to swallow it down. “i prefer our normal to theirs,” he explains, reaching over to gently caress his cheekbone, taking the route of just trying to make avery feel better about what he’s saying, not convincing him otherwise, ”don’t you?” he asks, eyes fluttering up to meet avery’s gorgeous blue orbs. the two of them have created a good life for themselves, theo would never want anything else, and he really hopes avery feels the same way.
“why dont we do something fun tonight?” theodore suggests, “we are in the city of looove,” he giggles some, propping himself up on an elbow, hoping this would cheer avery up. if no the suggestion or if he doesn’t want to, the light blush that’s becoming more prominent on his cheeks usually does.
space
#psychosocial.
・゚✧ and that's because i wanna be your favorite boy, i wanna be the one that makes your day, the one you think about as you lie awake. i can't wait to be your number one, i'll be your biggest fan and you'll be mine, but i still wanna break your heart and make you cry.