Author Topic: we мυѕт reιnvenт love !! [ p. ]  (Read 3245 times)

Offline elysian.

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Re: we мυѕт reιnvenт love !! [ p. ]
« Reply #60 on: August 21, 2018, 10:58:27 PM »
logan cain lawson
i will still be here, wishing and waiting for you
for the last few days, logan hadn’t quite felt… logan hadn’t felt whole. he didn’t feel like he was all together; he felt like pieces of him had been taken and scattered, forever lost and never to be found again. perhaps the more he toured through europe, through the countries he’d grown fond of over these years, he’d find those scattered pieces. he’d get to pick them back up again and try and be logan lawson; the always-happy, always-charming-and-bubbly singer. part of him wished that people would get to know the more mellow side of him, the more real side of him.

though he knew none of his previously said expectations would come true. those pieces were so small, so scattered out and hard to find that he couldn’t pick them up all by himself. he needed someone to help, but only one man in particular knew logan. only one person knew those pieces of him well enough to be able to find them. his eyes wandered towards the figure, small and quiet, shoulders shaking from the tears. isaac lawford was the only person who was capable of that; though, it would be asking a lot of a broken man to help find someone else’s pieces rather than your own.

logan knew that nobody else would get to know how he acted out of the spotlight aside from those near and dear to him. how many people knew that sometimes logan preferred comfortable silences? that he preferred just listening to music or singing softly to himself, without a crowd? there was so much more to logan than merely a bubbly and happy artist, and only few seemed to be able to see that side of him. his lower lip trembled as he watched isaac’s pain, wishing he could take the pain away. wishing they could go back to those soft, mellowed moments, rather than whatever the hell this had become.

he didn’t want to overstep his boundaries as he climbed on into isaac bunk. so when isaac merely stayed silent, stared up at the ceiling as a pained, upset expression stayed scribbled over those beautiful features, logan let it stay there for a long moment. now, one thing most people didn’t know was that logan rambled when he was nervous and sad (a rare sight, seeing as he was usually not nervous and upset). so, his ramblings probably hadn’t surprised isaac.

“of course i’d stick up for you. i care about you, you should know that.” sticking up for isaac was basically second-nature at this point for the young singer; he would do anything if it made isaac feel better about himself. besides, with such a shy mouse as a friend, he couldn’t see the tech wanting to stand up for himself. poor isaac probably thought he’d deserved that chewing out. it made him feel guilty. it made him nervous, and made him ramble even more about his feelings for isaac.

what he had said, truly, should’ve surprised the both of them. for a moment, he cursed himself for saying those sorts of things out loud. hadn’t he just come to terms with the fact that they’d never date? that isaac didn’t want them to date? yet, here he was, blabbering to his hopeless love, the person he believed to be meant for him, about how he wanted to be more-- or, at least, that he was upset knowing they’d never be more.

the silence that settled spoke more volumes than anything isaac could’ve said. it was enough for logan’s eyes to water that much more, for him to carefully reach a hand up to wipe at those watering eyes. he didn’t like feeling so soft and emotional, especially about something that had never even happened-- but he couldn’t help that isaac was his weakness, his kryptonite and the dent in his armor.

the only thing he hadn’t expected was for fingertips to gently brush against his cheek, for the gentle touch to graze the side of his face. it was.. intimate; soft. his shocked eyes matched eyes that seemed scared, fearful, even. did isaac truly want what he appeared to be preparing himself to do? though, soon, when isaac was leaning forward, he couldn’t blame the fear in those beautiful doe eyes. his heart was racing; he was scared, too.

yet, the moment those lips were against his, he came undone. sure, it was just a kiss, two lips pressing against each other. however, it spoke so much more than just two boys doing it for the hell of it. was this isaac finally admitting that maybe, just maybe, there was a chance they could be something more? was this isaac finally opening up to him, letting his heart be logan’s?

and logan held that heart with a gentle grasp, scared that if he held too tight or not tight enough that it would slip out of his grasp yet again. though, for once, as he pressed his lips against isaac’s, kissed him gently, isaac’s heart didn’t slip away. he wasn’t going to take this chance for granted.

it felt like a long while before logan finally willed himself to part from those sweet lips-- before he allowed himself to fathom even a moment without those lips pressed against isaac’s beautiful, chapped ones. his fingers had tangled in isaac’s hair, and when he’d pulled away, his eyes were alight with something… different. an indescribable sort of happiness. he moved closer, then, opted for pulling isaac close, holding him close.

“so you…?” trailing off, he sighed softly. for once, he wasn’t going to pester isaac. he wasn’t going to make him declare what they were, or where they stood. he wasn’t going to chase isaac away again, like he always seemed to do. with a small hum, he merely changed the topic by softly uttering, “mind if i stay in here? for the night?”

he couldn’t resist pressing another lasting kiss to those lips, resting his forehead against isaac’s and smiling softly. “maybe that kind of persuaded you a bit?” he figured he could joke around a bit, couldn’t he? all of logan wasn’t back together, not by a long shot. there were still pieces he’d need to find, or have someone else help him find. but.. for now, logan was starting to feel like he was almost whole again.



thes code
corey bleu
like stars in the sky, and leaves on the trees
it felt almost too good to be true. i mean, it was sort of hard to imagine that samson actually wanted to date him, wanted to be by his side. the thought was enough to send electricity throughout his body, waking up all of his senses. he wanted to take in everything in this moment; the grin on those lips, the tight hug, the elated laughter that had come spilling out.. he didn’t want to miss a single thing. he found elated laughter spill past his lips as well, especially as samson pointed out that he was a little shaky.

even as they let go of one another, and stood up, it was hard to ignore the butterflies that had been set free in his stomach. “i never thought you’d ask,” he softened, glancing over at the bassist, gaze lingering momentarily before moving away. “i would’ve been nervous, too. thank god you asked me rather than the other way around; it would’ve never happened.” he joked, a light in his eye as they walked.

his hands? that was enough for a light blush to come to his cheeks- relieved that he wasn’t the only one to have a light rose dusting his cheeks. “aw, hush,” he laughed softly, though betrayed those words with a gentle squeeze of his hand. “just wait. one day i’ll really knock your socks off with my romanticism. you aren’t even ready.”

it seemed like it was just the two of them left in the venue. that’s all corey could deduce, though, as he glanced around the quiet, vacant venue. it was nice to have some quiet every once in awhile, he supposed-- though of course it wouldn’t last long, since corey was just.. buzzing with happiness. “this honestly seems unreal,” he blabbed, glancing around the venue before turning his gaze back towards samson. “you know, i’ve kinda been crushing on your for a while, now.” might as well be up-front about it. and joke about it, too.

« Last Edit: August 22, 2018, 02:46:34 PM by inny. »

Offline truce.

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Re: we мυѕт reιnvenт love !! [ p. ]
« Reply #61 on: September 16, 2018, 10:19:47 AM »

I WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT
I GET KNOCKED DOWN ,
I WANT TO SHAKE IT
BUT I CAN'T BREAK FREE .

- Isaac James Ashford -
a
Isaac's chapped lips pressed tightly to form a thin line as he silently allowed for Logan to crawl into the bunk bed beside him. Never did Isaac think that the two of them would ever get to experience this sort of moment ever again but, then again, their relationship was always full of surprises, he supposed. He tried to remain stoic, his face ironically appearing emotionally pained with the way he attempted to conceal his feelings of grief. Between the two of them laying silently beside each other, Isaac's hurt gaze fixated on the ceiling, the static silence between the two of them would often not be as bothersome as it was now if the two of them hadn't of fallen out with each other. But, Isaac's heart raced anxiously, wishing he could just... Hide.

And so, it was so no surprise when Logan began to ramble - he was probably feeling awkward in the silence, too. As the raven-haired male spoke, Isaac turned his head to look at Logan, wanting to smile at his words but instead keeping his joy to himself. And then, something blissfully unspeakable happened. Isaac's warm eyes began to wonder, slowly lowering down to glance at the other's plump lips before quickly flitting his gaze back to look at Logan's inviting gaze. Logan was way too good for somebody as chaotic as Isaac, that was all too obvious. Logan was a successful superstar, his presence alone could bring smiles to thousands of faces. As for Isaac... He couldn't even make Logan smile.

He knew what could make Logan happy, though, what could make the both fervently gleeful. Hopefully, what could make the both of them whole again...

And so, he leaned in, eyes fearful and worried for what he was about to finally do and then... They were kissing. A part of Isaac wanted that moment to last forever but his anxious, scared side was sure to leave the kiss short and sweet, finally pulling away, jaw quivering very gently with adrenaline. Isaac ran the tip of his tongue across his bottom lip, eyes looking into Logan's nervously yet a tiny glimmer of a smile still appeared. He'd never felt so relieved in his life... He'd never felt so... Himself.

He almost completely missed what Logan had said, hesitating for a moment before subtly nodding his head and whispering sheepishly, "Uh... Yeah- Yeah of course... Please, stay." He hooked his bottom lip between his teeth, as quiet as usual, trying his hardest to wipe that God damned smile off his lips, but to no avail. And so, he lowered his head to nuzzle his face in the crook of Logan's neck and the pillow, allowing for himself to smile against Logan's collarbone and flutter his eyes shut. At peace, for once.

"Persuaded me? Duh." Isaac replied gently, chuckling to himself before adding, "Just so that you know... This is how things should be. No fighting, no hating each other's damn guts... I didn't come on this tour just to experience losing you all over again."







YOU ARE BRINGING OUT
A DIFFERENT KIND OF ME
THERE'S NO SAFETY NET
I'M FREE, FALLING ALL IN YOU .

- Samson Nathaniel Erwood -
a
Samson could still feel his insides whirling with excitable butterflies, his head even beginning to feel a little light from all of the adrenaline coursing through his body. Had he just asked Corey out? Never did Sam think that he'd ever venture down this path but, honestly, he was comfortable enough in his skin to be less anxious about this and instead electrified with delight. As he stood up straight, he crinkled his nose up as he laughed with Corey, squeezing onto his hand gently as they began to walk out of the room.

"Good thing I asked then. I just couldn't keep myself quiet for any longer." Samson laughed in response to their joking about, eyes twinkling with a new-found feeling of elation. He peered down at Corey, grinning like a total dork, "Hmph, I'm glad we're at least on the same page. Probably would've been a bit awkward if you didn't actually like me."

He couldn't stop himself from smiling with joy as the two of them spoke. There was simply something about Corey which could make Samson's cheek hurt from smiling; perhaps it was due to them still being in the honeymoon phase but... Honestly, Sam just was convinced that it was because Corey made him happy unlike anyone else had made him happy before. "I'll consider my feet cold the day you show me just how romantic you can be... You gonna write me a song?" He chuckled at his lame jokes before winking at his new boyfriend. His new boyfriend - that was enough to make him laugh to himself yet again.

Sam allowed for the two of them to pause for a moment to glance around at the empty venue, the only other person around being a merchandise guy packing away t-shirts and wristbands. Sam pulled his hand away from Corey's so that he could hang his arm across his shoulders, his heart racing with happiness. And then, I’ve kinda been crushing on your for a while, now. "Wait, really?!" Sam exclaimed, glancing over at Corey before snorting with laughter. "Dang, I wish I knew - I would've asked you out a lot sooner then! Would've saved me all this anxiety." He kidded, before adding, "C'mon, we should get back to the bus before they switch all the lights off."


◜ WISH YOU WERE HERE ◞
INFO. CHARACTERS.

Offline elysian.

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Re: we мυѕт reιnvenт love !! [ p. ]
« Reply #62 on: September 19, 2018, 02:25:04 PM »
logan cain lawson
i will still be here, wishing and waiting for you
although the kiss should’ve been the answer to all of logan’s dreams and thoughts, and deepest prayers, it wasn’t. it was devastating that it wasn’t. there was so much that he wanted to talk about: did this kiss mean something more? did this mean that they were a thing? did this mean that isaac actually cared for him the same way that logan cared for isaac? the list was endless. all of it was wanting to fight its way to the surface, slide off of his tongue and make his fears known. but, he knew he couldn’t. he knew that it would rip away this moment before he could truly grasp it. isaac was a unique individual. he didn’t handle emotions the same was as logan. he couldn’t be pushed. because if he was pushed a bit too far, then he’d break like fine china in loge’s hands.

with isaac, you can’t ask, you can’t push; you can only hope. and that’s exactly what logan chose to do.

when isaac said he could stay, he let a soft smile come to his lips as he murmured a gentle, “thank you.” ever since their momentary falling out, logan had spent hours in his own bunk, crying, panicking, having the worst moments of his life-- it was understandable that he didn’t want to go back there, so soon. seeing isaac’s giddy smile was enough for that soft, restrained smile to grow into an all-out grin, the softest bit of laughter passing his lips as he stared into those beautiful eyes. it only lasted a moment before it was gone, and logan was settled for holding isaac close to him, fingers absently finding their way to the little knobs of isaac’s spine, gently running along his back.

“i didn’t mean for it to happen. the whole situation just spun out of control and-” breathing in a deep sigh, he settled for resting his head against isaac’s own, closing his eyes. “i don’t know what to do with you sometimes.” the remark was said in a serious tone; however, seconds later and it was followed with a slightly uplifting huff. “you’re so shy one minute, and then a spitfire the next. so different than all those years ago.” shy isaac had become more of a ball of fire, that was for sure. but that wasn’t going to stop logan, any time soon.

growing confidence, he gently rocked back before using the momentum to push isaac onto his back-- and logan settled confidently above him. with a grin he tried to make himself comfortable (there was enough room to leave a bit of space between the two, but not enough for logan to full-on tower over him), before he alluded, “can we focus on something else...?” and with that he dared to press their lips together again, and, all the while, he couldn’t wipe off the growing smile that seemed permanently etched into his lips.


thes code
corey bleu
like stars in the sky, and leaves on the trees
part of this all seemed so surreal. it was hard to wrap his head around the fact that he had a boyfriend-- and that his boyfriend was samson, of all people. he didn’t even know where to start; he didn’t even know what all to expect. all he knew was that, deep down, he was willing to take any obstacle along this ride. enjoy it for however long it lasted (which, hopefully lasted for a long while). deep down, though, he didn’t want to worry about any of the problems that might come along. all he wanted to do was live in the moment with samson.

rolling his eyes playfully at samson’s next statement, he shook his head. “about time, more like,” he poked fun at samson, opting to send a wink the other’s way before laughing. samson’s grin was everything in that moment; it took a second or two to focus on samson’s sweet voice rather than that adorable smile. “really? i thought i was giving you all of the signals.” huffing with laughter for a moment, his voice got low as he sighed, “dang. guess i’m getting too old for this whole ‘flirting’ thing.”

gonna write him a song? the lame joke was enough for him to laugh yet again, opting to gently shove the taller, even while he barely budged, if at all. ”with this voice? no way. singing is your thing,” corey cared to point out. samson was the one with the amazing voice; corey was just… corey. how could he possibly compare to the greatness that was samson erwood?

as sam opted to throw an arm over his shoulders, corey felt a rush of happiness, of… goodness. so this was happiness, huh? corey guessed he could be happy with this. merely rolling his eyes yet again at the other’s kidding remark, he then nodded before they started making their way back to the bus. by the time they got there, corey’s stomach had settled into tight and uncomfortable knots into a.. bearable sort of excitement. a sort of ease. for the first time in a while, he felt a burst of confidence. turning towards samson, he softly cleared his throat before asking, feeling the nerves slowly starting to creep in. “would… a goodnight’s kiss be an option..?”
« Last Edit: September 19, 2018, 03:34:18 PM by inny. »

Offline truce.

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Re: we мυѕт reιnvenт love !! [ p. ]
« Reply #63 on: December 06, 2018, 04:38:39 PM »

I WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT
I GET KNOCKED DOWN ,
I WANT TO SHAKE IT
BUT I CAN'T BREAK FREE .

- Isaac James Ashford -
a
Wasn't the kiss supposed to be the climax of every tragic love story? After so much pain and hurt, it was the one thing that would resolve every problem? Well, the romance films were lying to us all, Isaac thought as he slowly pulled back away from Logan's lips. This should've been a happy ever after, but why did it feel like this was just the beginning?

It dissolved no confusion, no anxieties that pumped through Isaac's system, it dissolved none of the problems that the pair had been facing before. After all, this was all just a silly kiss, Isaac supposed. Where were the sparks and the fireworks, where was the sweetly triumphant music that harmoniously sung in the background? All Isaac could hear was Zack snoring in the bunk opposite and his own heart thudding against his chest like a percussion kit.

But, this worry that played Isaac's mind was muted fantastically by his seemingly somewhat confident exterior. He wanted Logan to stay, but it was just a matter of why. Why were they still pushing on, regardless of their previous argument? Why were they still bothering even after Logan gave up on them? Just friends, right? Just friends, my ass.

Yet, Isaac was still willing to try.

A light shiver was sent through his body as he felt feather fingertips trace up his prominent spine, Isaac wanting to smile coyly in Logan's direction but instead simply gazing with soft and gentle doe eyes. He listened in silence as the dark-haired man spoke in a breathy tone, Isaac's eyes fluttering shut as their foreheads pressed gently against one another. The next words that passed Logan's lips made Isaac want to protest yet he found no words to speak, merely blinking his eyes open again to peer back at Logan once again. "Then just keep doing what you're doing - I thought it was working for me." He responded in a hushed whisper.

Logan was right. Isaac had changed. The once stubborn yet sensitive man reduced to an anxious and awfully defensive mess - he was right, Isaac wasn't what he used to be. A couple years of self-hatred and loneliness can do that to a man.

But, this was the last thing that he wanted to think about in the moment, especially when Logan spun Isaac onto his back. Issac hummed a laugh, a surprised gleam in his eyes as he began to smile at Logan's newly found confidence. And, before Isaac had any chance to respond in any way, shape or form, Logan had pressed his lips against Isaac's once again and, this time, Isaac knew that he didn't exactly want to miss out on this opportunity. And so, after a moment of savoring the feeling, Isaac chose to eventually kiss back softly, shaky hands rising up to caress Logan's cheek as he squeezed his eyes shut.







YOU ARE BRINGING OUT
A DIFFERENT KIND OF ME
THERE'S NO SAFETY NET
I'M FREE, FALLING ALL IN YOU .

- Samson Nathaniel Erwood -
a
Samson simply couldn't wrap his head around the fact that he was dating another man now, and he knew it would take some time to really sink in before he could comprehend the fact. It just... It just seemed so right. He wanted nothing more than to be with somebody who made him happy, so this all worked out perfectly, right?

Grinning in return, Samson huffed and then began laughing at Corey's cheeky comment. "About time?! Perhaps you should've asked me if you were already so sure about it." He teased, wringing his hands together in front of him, eyes bright and cheery. They continued to chat as they continued to wander back to the bus, Samson chewing on his lip enthusiastically. "You think you're too old for this flirting business? When I was a kid, it was still flirtatious to hold a door open for your date or pay for their meal - nowadays kids are too busy writing on their mobile phones and sending snapshots to each other or whatever... Ugh, I'm just showing my age at this point."

As the topic of Corey writing a song for Sam came to mind, Sam shook his head slowly before insisting, "That voice? Of course, it's a lovely voice, I'm sure." He wasn't going to allow Corey to talk himself down, especially when Corey appeared to compare himself to anything and anyone. Samson just... Wanted Corey to realise just how amazing he was as his own person.

What was the first hour like being in a relationship with another man? Samson had to admit, it was not how he expected it to be. Though incredibly nervous of how people may respond to him, the overwhelming adoration he had for Corey seemed to drown out the worry to an extent. And so, Samson smiled down at his boyfriend, squeezing the others shoulder very gently as they walked. They arrived at the front of the bus, crickets humming quietly and the sound of the busy traffic in the distance droning on, as the two of them came to a stop. Sam wasn't expecting what Corey was to ask him next.

“Would… a goodnight’s kiss be an option..?”

Samson's heart felt like it was about to stop. Freezing on the spot, Sam stared over at Corey in shock for several seconds before pathetically stumbling over his words. "I - Uh, I'm s- I, uh, I'm sorry I..." He paused, his racing in his chest, a grimace riddling his features, "I'm not ready, yet... I- I'm so sorry." After going quiet for a moment, feeling incredibly embarrassed, Sam lowered his head and shrugged dismissively towards the door, "We should... Uh... Go back inside."

With a reaction like that, one would imagine it was Corey who was the reason Sam reacted so negatively, but that was so far from the truth... Sam pressed his lips together in a firm line. The last time he'd kissed somebody, it was his former wife who he dedicated his life to adoring, and look where that got him... Sam wouldn't let himself make the same mistake, his heart couldn't bear it...


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Offline elysian.

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Re: we мυѕт reιnvenт love !! [ p. ]
« Reply #64 on: December 06, 2018, 11:02:27 PM »
logan cain lawson
i will still be here, wishing and waiting for you
it wasn’t that logan was disappointed in the kiss. that was so far from the truth. if anything, it wasn’t even the kiss he was disappointed about, but merely himself as to why he didn’t feel such relief and happiness. there was happiness, but it felt overshadowed by the confusion, and the hurt that he didn’t know he’d felt all the way. he was just.. hopeful that this changed things, that maybe things would finally be coming together.

it still felt like all the pieces to the puzzle remained stagnant, though. none of them came together; if anything, it felt like the pieces had moved even further apart. the closer logan’s heart went to isaac’s, it seemed like the more confusing and heartbreaking their relationship was. but logan wasn’t going to let that stop him. he couldn’t. it wasn’t in him to just give up like that, especially on something important. isaac was important.

so, naturally, he felt a rush of confidence. between isaac and logan, isaac was much more sheepish and timid, and logan was just so - reckless, almost. he didn’t always think about the consequences of his actions, which was probably why the two of them were in this position in the first place. isaac had absolutely broken everything that logan had. but, still, here he was. feeling both happy and broken all at once because, while he felt like he was slowly coming back together, it felt like what he and isaac had wasn’t piecing itself back up quite yet. it was both infuriating and confusing all at the same time.

as he’d pushed isaac on his back, on top and with a newfound confidence, he couldn’t resist a smile. push the labels, the confusion, everything out of the equation. right now, it would be worth it all just to focus on the moment, on what was going on in the present. because, again, logan didn’t think about the consequences of the moment; he much preferred to think about the satisfaction from it. “is it working? have i finally figured you out?” the hushed whisper of words was lighthearted, just filled with nothing but adoration.

the kiss, after shoving all thoughts and fears aside, was perfect. how long had it been since he’d wanted to feel their lips together, with isaac actually kissing back? it was almost overwhelming, but it was too intoxicating to ever want to put an end to it. also, the secrecy of it all made it that much more thrilling. it made the adrenaline run through his veins, and just-- just know that he was completely lost in the moment, and completely lost in isaac.


thes code
corey bleu
like stars in the sky, and leaves on the trees
it had been a long time since corey had last dated someone. i mean, it had to be a completely different experience for samson, too. not only had it been a while since being back in the dating pool, but he’d also been dating a woman in that previous relationship. though, corey was sure that he could make samson happy. i mean, if he felt half as happy as corey did in that moment, then he was sure they were off to a great start.

the grin pulling at his lips was so real and genuine that his cheeks actually sort of hurt. it was so foreign, or at least it had been until sam had came into his life. “i was sure about it on my part. i dunno. maybe you were this flirtatious with all the boys,” he teased, meeting those bright and cheery eyes before turning his gaze away. the more amson continued to joke along about how the two were so old, he couldn’t resist shaking his head. “you can flirt by opening doors for me any time.” thinking about it, he hummed before adding, “but i will also accept random and silly selfies. just a heads up.” because if anyone was the king of embarrassingly stupid selfies, it was corey.

just like that, corey was sure that the relationship was off to a good start. well, that was, until he realized that he’d horribly, horribly messed up. the look on samson’s face said it all, and, for a moment, corey felt a fresh wave of guilt on his shoulders. it wasn’t samson’s fault for feeling this way. it was corey’s fault for pushing, for trying to be to fast. was he going too fast, being too straightforward? for a moment, all he could do was simply stare, feeling just as frozen in that moment as samson, except more so out of fear, and guilt. however, that feeling didn’t last too long. instead, it was quickly replaced with.. understanding. a soft and kind sort of understanding.

being upset about it would only make the situation worse. blaming himself was only going to add fuel to the fire. why he had his next idea, he would never know- but he found himself doing it anyway. shuffling closer, he gently placed a hand underneath samson’s chin and, oh-so-caringly, pressed a kiss to the man’s cheek. he didn’t know he had done it; it just felt so… natural. and, by all means, it wasn’t meant to be overwhelming, wasn’t meant to be a sign that he was settling with that. it was meant to show that he was there, and he understood. that he cared. hopefully that would get the point across.

“of course. let’s get inside,” he murmured, offering a smile samson’s way, a warm light in his eyes as he headed up the stairs. “i’m absolutely exhausted, so don’t snore too loud tonight, for me. promise?” corey never prided himself on being the best at brightening up awkward situations, but he was trying.


Offline truce.

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Re: we мυѕт reιnvenт love !! [ p. ]
« Reply #65 on: January 28, 2019, 02:00:32 PM »

IF YOU DON'T MIND, I'LL WALK THAT LINE
STUCK ON THE BRIDGE BETWEEN US
GRAY AREAS AND EXPECTATIONS
BUT I'M NOT THE ONE IF WE'RE HONEST...
~ talk me down by troye sivan



a
ISAAC JAMES ASHFORD.

If this was what love felt like, when why did it hurt so much? Why was is so difficult to figure out? This was no love story that others could only dream of replicating. Oh, God, Isaac wished that nobody else in the world would have to go through the emotional torment he and Logan had to endure to reach this point in their relationship. A first kiss was supposed to be the start of something new, the zenith of a great romance... But all this did was bring Isaac confusion.

The surprise of being rolled onto his back flitted across his features very briefly, eyes widening and lips parting before he relaxed, his lips cracking into a hesitant and small smile. It would be a lie if he were to say that he didn't wish for this to happen. After all, why would Isaac always be so willing to allow Logan to join him in his bunk? He adored the dark-eyed beauty, looking down at Isaac like there was something in him worth looking at. Isaac exhaled shakily, scared but relieved. How was such a feeling even possible?

His gaze searched Logan's, eyes beginning to smile at the realization that this was what was missing from his heart for all this time. Logan. It was him; it'd always been him. Isaac would question all of this ardour and intimacy when the morning came, but in the present moment, he'd do what felt right to him. And, that was to love Logan wholeheartedly, the way Logan deserved to be loved and adored. Isaac's eyes fluttered shut, moving his lips against Logan's own slowly, with a hint of uncertainty. He didn't know what he was doing, nor was he sure that this was the right thing to do, but only time could tell. Were they filling the void between their broken romance, or were they just destroying all that was left of their lethal love?

Logan was gentle as he whispered, Isaac's lids flickering as he peered up to his best friend innocently, heart racing against his chest. "I think perhaps." He was short with his answer, though his voice was laced with nothing more than tenderness and relief. Had they finally figured this mess out? Was the anguish over? Isaac was afraid, but he knew it was doubt speaking. This was impossible. Risky. Frightening. His brain tried to reason with him, but all his heart wished for was to give this love a try. And so, it would be what he'd do. He'd try.
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Offline elysian.

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Re: we мυѕт reιnvenт love !! [ p. ]
« Reply #66 on: January 29, 2019, 11:28:01 AM »
logan cain lawson
when logan had woken up the next morning, he hadn’t quite known what to expect. he’d initially figured he would’ve felt such joy, overwhelming happiness, to get to have isaac, finally, all to himself. but... that wasn’t what he’d felt. because isaac wasn’t his, was he? his eyes opened to just barely make isaac out in the darkness of the bunk, curtain keeping out all the light. there wasn’t much room in the bunks, so being so close to isaac was a given- holding him was a blessing.

it only confused him even more that he was in one of the best places, a position he’d dreamed of being in for years, and he wasn’t feeling such immense emotions. there was the slightest bit of happiness, but every thought that came to mind only pushed that happiness further and further away. the kisses last night should’ve meant everything, should’ve painted their situation black-and-white, distinguishable. however, logan couldn’t tell if it brought them closer or further apart. rather than giving them clarity, it only blurred the lines. it broke his heart.

reaching a hand up from isaac’s waist, where it had previously been resting, his fingers tangled in the other man’s hair. although logan had felt nervous, many times before, there wasn’t any kind of anxiety experienced before that could possibly compare to this moment. logan was scared. after all this time of chasing isaac, just to get shut down… could this really be it? something in him considered that this could be their happy ending, but everything else in him screamed not to get too close, not to fall for this man again. after all, he’d chased isaac- since when had isaac ever chased after him?

his heart was racing, both from anxiety and from feeling so full, and it was.. a conflicting feeling. “i’m sorry.” he didn’t even know if isaac was awake. what he did know was that he couldn’t put himself in this situation. not again. so, waiting to hear for the sound of footsteps to silence, he then crawled out of the bunk. with nothing else better to do, he went to the back of the bus, and began making coffee. the warmth from holding isaac still burned his chest, but felt so cold all at the same time.

Offline truce.

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Re: we мυѕт reιnvenт love !! [ p. ]
« Reply #67 on: February 03, 2019, 11:17:08 AM »

IF YOU DON'T MIND, I'LL WALK THAT LINE
STUCK ON THE BRIDGE BETWEEN US
GRAY AREAS AND EXPECTATIONS
BUT I'M NOT THE ONE IF WE'RE HONEST...
~ talk me down by troye sivan



a
ISAAC JAMES ASHFORD.

Heavy eyes slowly peeled open, blinking a couple time until the grogginess began to subside. He'd woken up in his own company, as usual, but this time he felt somewhat surprised. Turning his head, he blinked over to the space Logan had occupied that night, a sinking feeling in Isaac's chest like an anchor dragging him back down into the depths of the ocean. Where it was dark. Silent. Lonely. Isaac was alone again and, strangely enough, he didn't want to feel this lonely. Last night was the first time in a long, long time that Isaac had felt a sense of comfort in Logan's arms. A sense of belonging. They'd kissed. It all should've been the beginning of the happy ending.

But, Isaac's luck had recoiled and he was left alone again. And, this time, he was craving Logan's touch. Why was he feeling this way? He'd promised to himself he could never do this to him nor Logan. They were simply bound to fail - had they not learned the first time they tried to pull off something like this? Isaac felt afraid. He wasn't prepared to lose Logan again, but what made him think he would lose him again? Isaac was fluent in pessimism, perhaps he had to begin to realize that there was more in life than to destroy everything in his path. Logan's way of life seemed to relaxing... So joyous and optimistic. If only Isaac could see the world in the same light.

He cracked the smallest of smiles, peering up at the bunk above him, thinking of nothing but the events that had unfolded last night. But then, it fell again. This was why Isaac always insisted on locking away his emotions. Once he set them free, it was only a matter of time before he'd fall hard again; nobody would be there to catch him. And so - CRASH. He'd just crash onto the pavement, cold and alone. It was always how he ended up. Cold and alone. He released a small sigh before dragging himself out of his bunk, pulling on a shirt before he shuffled his feet to the back of the bus to grab himself a soda. Was it too early to drink soda? For most people, yes. For Isaac? Of course not.

He gulped hard as he saw Logan, hesitating for just a moment before heading over towards the mini fridge, wiping the rheum from his eyes before taking out a soda and popping the lid open. He stretched before taking a gulp of his drink, feeling Logan close to him. The touch was barely there, but he could feel his warmth. It was slightly comforting. "Did you sleep okay?" He chose to ask, wandering nonchalantly over to the booth and taking a seat, deciding that there was no way he'd speak of the kiss... Or kisses. His gaze was lowered, watching as he mindlessly swiveled the tab of his drink around and around until it broke off the can. Logan wouldn't speak of the kiss. Isaac liked to hope, anyway.
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Offline elysian.

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Re: we мυѕт reιnvenт love !! [ p. ]
« Reply #68 on: February 04, 2019, 11:20:46 AM »
logan cain lawson
logan didn’t know how to react. wasn’t it just yesterday that he’d told isaac that he’d missed his chance? given, he’d been in a state of panic, but telling isaac that had brought him just a brief taste of relief. of freedom. he’d been chasing after isaac for all of those years… he’d gone through so much heartache and heartbreak that the thought of finally giving up seemed almost blissful. after all, this whole tour had been full of heartbreak. he’d been rejected by his best friend only a few weeks ago. isaac had absolutely tore him to shreds days ago. he’d told isaac that he’d missed his chance yesterday- only to be kissed by him that same night.

they had a tangled web of a relationship, and logan couldn’t find it in himself to dig further into what any of it meant for the two of them. after all of these years, logan had spent so much of his time questioning and prying again and again into what their relationship could mean. this time, though, he had decided that he wasn’t going to do that anymore. he wasn’t going to constantly wonder what they were, or wonder what was going on in isaac’s beautiful mind- at least that was what he told himself. the moment he saw isaac, those same prying thoughts and emotions came up to the surface. turning his head away, he instead focused on pouring himself a cup of coffee.

isaac was so close. if it had been any other day, any other moment, he probably would’ve slung his arm over the other’s shoulders as if it were nothing. today, though, he just settled on the barely-there touch that was there for only a moment until isaac was off again. his gaze wandered to isaac as he asked how he slept. and there, in that moment, it was obvious that they were going to do what they did best. they weren’t going to talk about what had happened, they weren’t going to talk about the kisses… while he usually felt upset about it, today he felt relief. “oh, yeah. slept great.” he sent a smile isaac’s way, and for a moment convinced himself that everything was alright- even if it was far from the truth.

after filling his coffee mug with more sugar and milk than coffee itself, he chose to wander to where isaac was, sliding into the booth across from him. “how’d you sleep?” it was a simple question, rather absent one, but he supposed that it helped to diffuse the tension. taking a sip of coffee, he hummed. “do you want a cup?” he glanced over at the other’s soda, smiling against the rim of the mug before adding, “or are you fine with your sugar in a bottle?” he supposed that the other’s drink was just as sugary as logan’s own. it didn’t seem like there was too much tension, but it felt-- awkward. logan didn’t know how else to describe it. but he preferred this awkward conversation over talking about what had happened last night.

Offline truce.

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Re: we мυѕт reιnvenт love !! [ p. ]
« Reply #69 on: February 07, 2019, 01:10:17 PM »

IF YOU DON'T MIND, I'LL WALK THAT LINE
STUCK ON THE BRIDGE BETWEEN US
GRAY AREAS AND EXPECTATIONS
BUT I'M NOT THE ONE IF WE'RE HONEST...
~ talk me down by troye sivan



a
ISAAC JAMES ASHFORD.


As if Isaac wasn't already feeling confused enough about the rocky relationship he had with Logan, the dark-haired man only made things even more puzzling for Isaac. After all, it almost felt as if he was beginning to want to come to terms with the fact that he may... May actually have genuine feelings for Logan. Maybe... Just maybe. Isaac slumped over in the booth, tapping away mindlessly at the tin can as his eyes followed Logan in contemplation. Perhaps last night was the moment that Isaac finally woke up from the nightmare that was also known as loneliness. This all confused him terribly, but it also gave him an entirely new lease of life. With Logan around, Isaac felt alive knowing that maybe they'd figured their differences out. The fear that was once enveloping him was slowly unraveling from the very core of his being; soon Isaac would be free to love Logan.

It wouldn't be an easy feat though, would it? Usually between the two of them, things could never be that simple. Tangled up a complicated mess for so many years, it would be a miracle if they were to escape from trouble this quickly, and so Isaac wouldn't keep his hopes up. After all, perhaps yesterday was a once off. Perhaps they'd never share a moment like that again. The very thought struck at his heart woefully for a moment, and the more he thought about it, the more he could remember that he'd once missed the feeling of Logan's love. He finally had grasped onto it once again - there was no way he could let him slip through his fingers ever again.

But, he was cautious. If he were to throw himself towards Logan, what would happen if Logan wouldn't be there to catch him? Isaac would always dwell on doubt and pessimism, and for good reason too. He could never miss something that he never even had. But now, Isaac was so close to getting what he could only dream of for years. So close. "Good." He mumbled in response, eyes smiling over at Logan almost cheerily (which was very unlike Isaac this early in the morning) as he leaned back in his seat, hoping that a kiss was enough to mend broken hearts.

Oh, was Isaac so naive sometimes. He flickered his gaze up as Logan took a seat across from him, blinking tiredly over at the beautiful man sat in front. "All right. It's pretty snug in the bunk with two people." He commented quietly, cracking a tiny smile at the thought. He'd not talk about the kiss - God, that'd be too awkward for him to confront - and so he'd change the topic of conversation. Though, before he even had the opportunity to do so, Logan was right there doing the hard work for him. And so, Isaac took a sip of his soda, rolling his eyes at Logan's joking remark before lowering the can down and replying sarcastically, a very tiny glimmer of a smirk playing on his lips, "I'm good thanks. Want some soda or are you all right with your sugar in a cup?" He nodded his head towards the man's hot drink before snorting playfully, "I know how you like your coffee sweeter than the sugar itself."
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Offline elysian.

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Re: we мυѕт reιnvenт love !! [ p. ]
« Reply #70 on: February 09, 2019, 11:03:16 AM »
logan cain lawson
logan liked to think that last night might have changed everything for them. however, the more he looked, the more he began to realize that that necessarily wasn’t the case. it was just like every other time they fell apart; they came back together again, and acted like that falling apart hadn’t happened. logan could’ve sworn that he’d broken isaac yesterday, broken him to the core when he’d told him he’d missed his chance, that logan wasn’t going to pursue him anymore. but, looking over at isaac, those eyes smiling over at him in a way that made his heart race away in his chest-- it felt like he’d never even broken isaac in the first place. “good,” he responded back, trying not to seem completely awed by the beautiful man across the room, feeling his lips pulling into an easy smile.

there was a lot for them to talk about. logan wanted to tell isaac so many things. he wanted isaac to know how the vocalist was always so quick to forgive him for everything, even when isaac had absolutely broken him the other week. he wanted isaac to know that he was falling helplessly for him, and it absolutely terrified him. there was this uncertainty about it all this time. fear. too many times had this same thing happened, only for logan to plummet to the ground with nobody to catch him. isaac had let him down too many times in the past. even after all of their history, he was scared to admit it. isaac had let him down. and he wasn’t going to risk the same thing happening again. his heart couldn’t open up to isaac, not again.

so he wasn’t going to pursue isaac. but he was going to enjoy what they had. see if isaac even really wanted him, or just liked the thought of being pursued by someone all the time. right now, with quiet conversations… logan liked to think he cared. he felt his lips pulling sheepishly at the other’s mention of the bunk. almost surprised isaac had brought it up… it was a situation that, if they’d been caught, they would’ve been in more trouble than loge could possibly imagine. it felt wrong, felt forbidden- but at the same time it felt good. “more of an excuse to be close to you,” he murmured quietly, eyes shining with a smile as he took a large gulp of his coffee. sure, he said he wasn’t going to chase isaac, anymore… though, did giving isaac the compliments he deserved really count as chasing after him? he’d say it didn’t count.

sugar in a cup. he should’ve seen that one coming from a mile away. isaac knew too many things about logan; to even try and act like there was an even sugar-to-coffee ratio in his cup was next to impossible. “well-” he thought about defending himself, only to decide, “who actually likes the taste of coffee, anyway? gotta drown the taste out with something.” also known as, an excuse for loge to dump way too much sugar into his cup. at least he knew for sure that isaac didn’t like the taste of coffee. if logan ever made him a cup, maybe he’d actually drink it more often. a comfortable silence between them settled in, and the brunet couldn’t find it in himself to disturb it. there was just something about being in isaac’s company that made him feel so at ease, relaxed. taking another few sips of his hot drink, he let his gaze settle on isaac for a moment before finding a smile come to his lips.

and, in that moment, even when he shouldn’t have felt completely at ease, something in him just felt… so genuinely happy. he felt like he was glowing with happiness in that moment. still, all he could do was just lean back comfortably in his seat, softly deciding to say, “you’ll- like the song that replaced impossible year.” because the song, much like impossible year, was about him. and logan had wanted to say that, but something just kept him from telling isaac. a small pocket of doubt, of fear… it was slowly starting to seem like their relationship wasn’t as perfect as he’d initially hoped.